Facing the Past
by KakashiSukiDaYo
Summary: Kakashi had been tortured and now is a broken man. Will Sakura be able to help him? How will their friendship change? KakaSaku. Warnings: LEMON in the 9th chapter. Kakashi Gaiden spoilers!
1. Revenge

**A/N:** This is a Kakasaku story. I know Kakashi is fourteen years older than Sakura and her former teacher, but please note that in this fiction, he is no longer her teacher and Sakura is twenty years old (which makes Kakashi thirty-four years old), which means she is an adult and can make her own love-life choices. Anyway, if you don't like the pairing, don't read.

I really have to thank moodiful819 for having beta'ed my story. She hasn't just corrected my grammar errors; her style added so much to my story that it's now more interesting even if the plot is the same. If you'll like this story, you should be grateful to her, too!

**Disclaimer:** Too bad I don't own Naruto, and you really don't know what I'd give to own Kakashi!

* * *

**FACING THE PAST**

**Chapter 1: Revenge**

* * *

It was a nice day in Konoha. The sun shined brightly in the sky with only a few white clouds running after one another due to the warm breeze of late spring. Kotetsu and Izumo were at the gates; one was reading some papers for the Hokage while the other had his gaze lost in the green trees above him.

"What the hell?!"

The peaceful atmosphere was broken by Izumo's cry, eyes wide as if he had seen a ghost. "What's the matter, Izumo-san?" asked Kotetsu, who had yet to raise his gaze from the stack of papers in his hands.

"Isn't that Kakashi-san down there?"

As soon as Kotetsu looked at the man who was entering Konoha's gates, his jaw clenched. Kakashi had left with his client, a young woman, a week ago on an escort mission that was to be two weeks long, but now he was being dragged with his hands tied behind his back by the very client he was supposed to escort. Looking down, the two spotted the gleam of the kunai at his throat and, most shockingly of all, he was shirtless and mask-less, his sharingan eye covered only by his silver locks.

"Tell your Hokage to immediately gather all of the shinobi and civilians who are still within the village to the main square or else he'll die," the woman shouted to the two flabbergasted shinobi at the gate. Her lips were pulled into a firm, hardened line while her eyes glared out at them through narrow slits, causing a shiver to run down both their spines. Hesitantly, Kotetsu glanced at the captive Copy Nin. It seemed that he had been drugged or something along those lines because his visible eye held no light at all, as if he wasn't there in that moment.

Immediately, Izumo jumped toward the Hokage tower as Kotetsu kept an eye on the woman, not trusting her to be left alone with Kakashi.

Half an hour later, the civilians and all the available shinobi were standing in the square, mouths gaping before the dazed Kakashi. No one had ever seen him so vulnerable, and—despite the gravity of the situation—many of the women (and some men too) couldn't help but drool at the sight. To say he was gorgeous was an understatement, and with those lean muscles and rock-hard abs, it was a wonder how they hadn't jumped his bones before.

Scanning the crowd before her, the woman holding Kakashi smiled triumphantly, as if showing off her prize to the her captive audience. It was in the front of the crowd that a familiar pink-haired girl stood; her blonde teammate and their current Hokage beside her with equally frowning faces. Seeing their displeasure and the angry gleam in the pink-haired girl's eyes, the woman realized that those three were his friends. She smiled.

"See Kakashi, have you ever been so exposed to your citizens? So defenceless? You, the great Copy-nin: Sharingan Kakashi, the man who always hid himself not only from strangers' sight but from his friends' too. How do you feel right now? Frightened? Ashamed?" she said with a cackle as she lifted him by his hair to level with her face. Kakashi merely stared back at her, but it wasn't like his normal apathetic expression. It was emptier, devoid of all emotion. His eyes were lifeless as well, just as Izumo and Kotetsu found him. A shiver collectively ran down their spines.

Cerulean eyes flickered back and forth between the sneering woman and the empty man. He couldn't understand this. What was going on? How could this happen?! This was Kakashi-sensei, one of the strongest men he ever had the pleasure to know and this woman…this stupid bitch was making a mockery of him.

Anger coursed through his veins, his irises colouring with the Kyuubi's chakra as his lips curled into a snarl. He felt like he was going to explode, but Sakura's temper burst first.

"YOU! HOW DARE YOU?!" she screamed from the crowd, her brows furrowed in her anger.

"My, my, look at the pretty little kunoichi. She's your ex-student, isn't she? I saw her in your mind during our little psych sessions…" The woman's mouth grew in a devilish grin. "Hey pinkie, come up here. Why don't you take a closer look to your sensei? But be careful; try anything and he'll die!" she said with a twisted smile. Hesitantly, Sakura came closer, stopping an arm's distance before him. Kakashi didn't seem to have noticed.

"Touch him," the woman ordered, "feel his straight nose, his strong jaw, those thin lips, his chin…" Her voice was now persuading, enchanting. "Have you ever wondered how his entire face was? I bet all of you were curious about it. You should be thankful to me!" she laughed before pausing as if realizing something. "But maybe you'd prefer to see him completely naked. I really wanted to drag him here that way, you know, but I found he would have gotten too much attention during our little trip. But I could always make up for it right now…"

Sakura opened her mouth, an angry retort sitting on her tongue as she glared at the woman with loathing. The woman pressed the kunai against his throat. "TOUCH HIM! NOW!" Her voice left no room for argument.

Slowly, Sakura raised her left hand, throwing wary glances at the triumphant woman as she reached toward Kakashi before letting her fingers rest on his face. His skin was still warm.

Curiosity took over her at that moment. It had never occurred to her that Kakashi's skin could be so smooth and the feel of silk beneath her fingertips surprised her as she traced his handsome features. Realizing what she was doing, she blushed and just for a second, Kakashi's eye gleamed before the orb became lifeless again.

As soon as the woman saw Sakura blushing, she burst into a mocking laugh. Realizing that this was a once in a lifetime opportunity, she concentrated her chakra to her hidden hand and threw a punch, knocking the woman through a stone wall and a bit further before landing on the ground, barely alive.

Instantly Kakashi fell to his knees, lowering his face as his legs buckled under his own weight. Kneeling beside him, Sakura scanned his body for any obvious injuries as Naruto, Genma, and Gai ran towards the woman. Noticing the coolness that touched her forehead, she looked up to see Tsunade who gave her a nod, telling the girl that she was to take care of Kakashi. Nodding in return, Tsunade smiled with satisfaction and stood, scattering the onlookers before joining the group by the woman to prevent Naruto from killing her. She had questions, after all.

"How are you, Kakashi-sensei? Are you injured? It looks like you've been poisoned!"

"I'm right, Sakura. At least, my body is. I just need to go home," he rasped, his voice hoarse.

"Ok, hold on just a moment," she replied, taking off her holster and unravelling the bandages from her leg.

"What are you doing, Sakura? I told you I'm fine," he said while raising his eyes to her.

"I know, Kakashi, but you'll soon thank me. Just wait and see." With that, she began wrapping the bandages around the lower portion of his face, hiding it. As soon as she finished, he gave a sigh.

"Even if we've already seen your face, I know you feel naked without your mask. This will help you feel a little more comfortable."

"Thank you, Sakura"

"And now, the ropes."

"They were reinforced with chakra before, but I guess they're fine now…" he informed her.

"You're right. Here, all done! Now I just need to heal your wrists and find out what she did and fix it."

"It's not so simple, Sakura. I don't think there is a cure for this," he whispered softly.

"Huh?"

"I…It's just…just for now…for now, I need to get away from here and from these people." His voice was strangled; the sounds of the high-pitched squeaks and the slight tremors in his voice echoing in the recesses of her mind. "Home…I need to go home. Just take me home and you can heal my wrists there." His eyes held hers, staring deeply into them with a pleading she had never known to be there as his hands shook and his voice trembled. He clasped her hands in his. _"Please."_

Meanwhile, Tsunade reached them through the crowd. Giving a quick nod to Kakashi, she motioned for Sakura to come with her. Sakura cast a worried glance at him. "I'll be back in a second, sensei."

"The guys are taking that woman to the prison. Did he tell you what happened? How is he?" Her voice was concerned.

"Apart from his wrists, he doesn't have any physical injuries, but shishou…"

"Yes, Sakura?"

"Shishou…he…you're not going to believe this, but…I think he's been tortured. I don't know how to explain it—he's barely been touched!—but I think she did something to him," said Sakura, her eyes hesitant.

Tsunade frowned as she put two and two together. "I see. That's why he looks so… hollow." She stood there for a minute, deep in thought before her eyes settled back on Sakura's. "Follow me," she said leading the girl back to her sensei's fallen form. She took a deep breath and sighed.

"Sakura told me everything. Unfortunately, there's nothing we can do for you at the moment; at least, not in the hospital. There's no quick fix for what you've just gone through. The only thing that can help you is to open up to someone and tell them what happened.

I know you're a reserved man, but it's your only hope for getting out of this in the least amount of time possible. We both know you have friends and they'd be more than willing to let you stay with them. You could even ask them to help you through this, but in my personal opinion, I would recommend Naruto or Sakura since they probably know more about you than any of us. And if you don't want the entire village to know your business, I suggest you choose Sakura, but that's just me. My opinion doesn't really matter here. What happened to you isn't something I can help you with. How you heal and how long is something only you can decide."

Kakashi stared at the ground, absorbing her words with slow breaths before replying. "As long as I don't think I need to be baby-sit, Sakura is fine with me. That is, if she's ok with it…" he said turning to her.

Sakura blinked. "Oh! Y-Yes, I'm fine with it."

"I see," Tsunade stated, "you're dismissed. Take as long as you need, then report to me about what happened. In the meantime, I'll be interrogating this woman personally," she said walking off towards the Hokage Tower before pausing. "By the way," she said without turning behind her, "can you at least tell me who this woman is and why she did this to you? I have a right to know." Kakashi coughed harshly before replying.

"She's the daughter of an S-class criminal I killed during a mission under the Third Hokage. His name was Yasuoka Keiichiro. I'm guessing she wanted to avenge her father's death with my own. I'd say she succeeded," he answered gravely as he stood, resting heavily against Sakura as he stared vacantly at the ground. Sakura's heart clenched at those last words.

"Come on, let's go now. You'll be fine, I promise," she said, urging him to move as she led him through the busy streets.

* * *

**A/N****:** I hope you enjoyed it! Reviews are really appreciated!


	2. A broken man

* * *

**FACING THE PAST**

**Chapter 2: A broken man**

* * *

They stopped by Sakura's place to take some clothes and personal effects for the next few days before heading to Kakashi's apartment. She had never been there so she was a little curious to see it. Funny how he knew a lot about her and she barely knew anything about him.

Once there, Sakura waited politely as Kakashi opened the door. It was small, but tidy and clean. The kitchen opened to the living room and to the right, there were two doors: one leading to his bedroom and one to the bathroom. In the living room, there was a couch and looking at it, it seemed rather comfortable.

'Good, I think I'll sleep quite well on it,' she thought.

While she was checking out his place, he told her to make herself comfortable and went straight to the bedroom, leaving the door open as he flopped onto the bed.

After a few moments, she knocked on the doorpost to ask permission to enter. Giving her a wave of permission through the opening, she went in.

"Do you want me to heal you now, sensei, or do you want to take a shower first?"

"I'm too tired. I'll just take a nap for now. The wrists can wait and so the shower. I'll take the couch for the night, so you don't worry." With that, he closed his eyes, signaling the conversation was done.

Though the conversation had ended, she wouldn't let him sleep on the couch, but she wasn't going to protest for the moment. He needed rest right now; she would have resumed the matter later after his nap.

"I don't think those bandages are very comfortable. Let me at least take them off. I'm not going to peep!"

He didn't catch her joke and his voice held no trace of amusement when he replied. "Ok."

She gave a sigh and began to unravel the bandages.

"I can do it by myself, you know?"

"I know, but I also know your wrists are aching and since you've been tied up for a few days, your hands and arms are probably sore all over, aren't they? That's why I'm helping you; besides, if you don't let me do something, I'll go insane!"

This time he gave a little smirk. "You could always read me Icha Icha aloud; it's quite a good boredom killer, you know?"

"Sensei!" she retorted, scandalized.

"What? You're of age now, aren't you? How old are you, Sakura?"

"Twenty, but that doesn't mean I want to read those smut novels!" The frown deepened on her face, but she couldn't hide the amused sparkle in her eyes. If he was still interested in his dirty orange books, it meant that there was still hope for the silver-haired man.

All along the walk to his apartment, she wondered what she could have done to help him. She deeply cared for her sensei; she owed him so much that she'd do anything to help him, but she felt helpless because even with all her medicinal studies, she didn't know anything about torture or its treatment. Hell, she didn't even exactly know what happened to him! If what Tsunade said was true, she would just have to keep him company and listen to him—but he was so reserved! She doubted he would tell her anything. She would have to be a friend to him before he could open up with her, but she didn't know how to do it. They'd known each other for so long now and they spent a lot of time together, but they've never became close. A few times she had opened her heart to him when she was worried about Sasuke, but he never did the same to her. And lately, they hadn't seen each other that much, so right now, they were more distant than ever.

The fact he was now joking about something, gave her some hope, though. Maybe she should just follow the flow. Besides, living together would give them many occasions to talk about a lot of things and when they became accustomed to each other and more confident, maybe he'd open up to her.

So, for now, teasing would be fine with her.

As soon as she finished unraveling his bandages, she closed her eyes. She knew how much he cared for his privacy, and she didn't want him to become distrustful with her. Sure, she had already seen his face earlier that day, but against his will; so she wasn't going to see him if he didn't tell her to. As if reading her mind, he spoke.

"It's ok, Sakura, you can open your eyes. You'll be stuck here with me for the next few days and I don't want you to feel uncomfortable trying to look at anything but my face."

She kept her eyes closed, so he placed his hands on her shoulders to better catch her attention and sighed.

"Listen to me, Sakura. I'm already sorry to trouble you so much by making you babysit me. I don't want you to feel awkward all the time. And besides, you've already seen it, so I fail to see where the problem is."

She then opened her eyes and he gave her a small, concerned smile. She couldn't help but blush seeing him smile. It was so annoying that she couldn't look at his face without turning red! She seriously hoped she would get used to it soon.

He noticed her blushing, but was too tired to tease her, nor was he in the right mood. He was actually surprised that he had the spirit to tease her about Icha Icha novels. 'At least I'm not completely dead, it seems. Good,' he thought.

She helped him to wear a loose shirt to be more comfortable in bed, then gave him a smile and exited the bedroom, the door closing softly behind her.

* * *

"OBITO!! NO!!"

Sakura was reading a medic scroll on the couch when she heard his scream.

Bursting into his bedroom, she saw he was still sleeping, moving his arms furiously and shouting something, his skin glistening with sweat.

"Sensei! Sensei! It's just a dream, sensei! Wake up, please!"

Shaking his shoulders, he woke immediately and sat up, eyes wide and breathing labored, a frightened expression on his face. Looking around, he saw her sitting at his side on the edge of the bed and desperately flung himself into her, his arms resting around her neck as he swallowed hard, gasping for breath.

To say she was surprised was an understatement. Kakashi never touched people when he could help it and hugging was unheard of for him, but he was shivering so fiercely that she couldn't care about that. Regaining her senses, she returned his hug, whispering soothing words into his ear as if he were a child.

Seeing him like this, hearing him sob into her shoulder, drenching her shirt in his tears, she was almost as scared as him. This was so unlike him. Kakashi was so different that it frightened her. Where was the strong, collected man in her memories? Tears threatened to spill from her eyes.

'I can't believe this is Kakashi. He never acts like this! I'm scared. He's so different now. He's crying and I don't like it. Kakashi never cries. He doesn't act like this. He just doesn't! What do I do?! What do I do?!'

After a few minutes, Kakashi released his hold on her and gave her a sheepishly look, while scratching the back of his neck with one hand, the other sitting on his lap.

He laughed nervously. "It seems Tsunade was right, after all. I really do need a babysitter."

The relief at him returning to normal brought a sweet smile on her face "Yes, and I'm happy it's me."

"Why's that?"

"In these eight years we've known each other, this is the first time I can do something to help you. You've saved my life so many times and I've never been able to thank you properly."

"Oh… it sounds like I'm becoming old and useless…"

"No, it just means I'm not a helpless little girl anymore!" Sakura argued.

"But you haven't been like that since when you were fifteen. You've gotten stronger since you've started training with Tsunade."

"Maybe, but I think that real strength comes from being able to help a friend …"

He knew what she was talking about. Even if she had become a very strong kunoichi, she hadn't been able to help Sasuke. She still carried the scars from the night he left. He had been right there and she couldn't stop him. The pain she felt must have been unbearable.

And now, without having to use any kind of strength, she had the opportunity to help him. She really wasn't a naïve little girl anymore.

"I see. Well, I'm happy it's you."

"Why's that?"

"Because I think that you'll understand me."

"I really hope so."

They stayed there in silence for a little while, lost in their own thoughts as they sat on the bed when Sakura glanced at the clock.

"Well, it's about time to eat something! What do you want for dinner, sensei…?"

* * *

They ate mostly in silence, and she tried hard to not look at him, but the two times he caught her staring, he didn't protest. He simply gave her a small smile and went on eating.

After dinner, she read some medic scrolls while he took a shower before immerging himself in his beloved Icha Icha until it was time to go to bed.

Kakashi headed toward the bedroom. "I'm going to change the sheets; hold on a minute."

Sakura rolled her eyes; time to deal with the bed/couch argument.

"No way, sensei. I'm the medic here and you're the patient, so I'll take the coach." She hoped that an authoritative tone would prevent him from questioning.

"I can't let you sleep on the couch. Regardless of our positions as caretaker and patient, you're still the guest. You're taking the bed."

Sakura sighed and felt like slapping her forehead. What was she thinking? This was Kakashi. He wouldn't obey authority unless it bit him in the ass, and even then, it was still iffy. "Don't you know how many times I've slept in a chair by your bedside when you were in the hospital? I don't see any difference now."

"But they were what? One night—two at the most? We don't know how long you'll be stuck here with me. It makes a world of difference."

"Sensei, the last time you were in the hospital, I've slept on a chair for a week!"

His eyes widened. "An entire week?! How did I not know about…?"

"That's because you were unconsciousness all the time…"

"Well…thank you for that," he said awkwardly. He was slightly embarrassed. The fact his eyes were glued to the floor was a testament of that.

"It was ok then, it's ok now. You need to rest well, so I'll take the couch. Deal?"

Kakashi sighed. He should've remembered how stubborn Sakura was once she got her mind set on something. Covering his face with his hand, he sighed. "Deal. You're just lucky I'm not in the mood to fight right now."

"I know," she smiled.

"There's a blanket in that drawer. Good night, Sakura."

"Good night, sensei. See you in the morning."

* * *

"FATHER!! Please, don't leave me!! WHY?! WHY?!"

Sakura almost fell off the coach as she heard him cry. She ran to the bedroom and found him covered in sweat, tossing and turning in his sleep. She woke him up and hugged him as he sat up, whispering sweet nothings into his ear. He slowly calmed down and returned her embrace, but his breathing was still labored.

"Thank you…" His voice cracked before he could say her name.

"I'll stay here until you'll fall asleep again, don't worry." She released him, trying to get off the bed, but he pulled her to him.

"Stay," his voice was almost a whisper.

Her eyes grew wide.

"Wh-What?! What do you mean by that?"

He just laid down pulling her with him. His body was slick and trembled against her small frame. His exhales were sharp and damp on her skin. Looking down at him, she could see his struggle to keep awake despite the adrenaline in his system. How long had it been since he had a good night of sleep?

They lay on their sides, face to face, and he curled up to her, resting his forehead in the crook of her neck as their legs tangled together. Her cheeks became dyed in red, but she remained still and listened to his breathing even.

"I can't sleep alone anymore. The cold, the loneliness—I feel so alone that I can't stand it. Don't worry, I won't do anything to you. You know me, and in any event, you'd probably deck me before I could lift a finger, so please?"

"I'm not a teddy bear, you know?"

He became quiet all of a sudden and she could feel him shift away. Had she hurt him with her words? It couldn't be that. She had meant it as a joke, even though it was partially true that she couldn't do that. Maybe she should've told him her plan of sleeping in a chair beside his bed, but still, it was sticks and stones. He couldn't possibly have taken it seriously, but he did. She could feel it in the way he pulled away from her. His hands were trembling as they left her arms and she had never felt more surprised in her life. What was more, she had never felt more like a jerk in her life. He needed her. He really needed her and here she was brushing off everything he did as an exaggeration.

'I can't believe how different he is now. He seems so small. He's scared of practically everything. What did she do to you, sensei? What did she do? You're hurt, but I can't help you! Damn it! Why did she have to do this to you?!'

She waited for her anger to calm down before speaking again.

"I'm sorry, sensei. I'll stay. You don't have to worry anymore. I won't leave you," she said softly as she moved to cradle him against her when a silly image came to her mind. "You know? You're just lucky you've chosen me instead of Gai-sensei, or else you'd be going to sleep cuddled next to him right now." She suppressed a giggle. She didn't know from where it came, but maybe a quip could offer him a distraction and though he didn't reply, she felt him shudder against her skin.

Seeing as her joke had little effect to bring him from his misery, she tried again. "I'd have preferred if your bed was double and not a single one…"

"I don't see how it would've made a difference. You still would've been next to me on the bed," he said matter-of-factly, but she could hear the tremor in his voice. He was trying to look strong. He was still trying to be calm and cool for her and it killed her inside. He was the one in pain, but he was still thinking of her, and she cursed her selfishness. She was supposed to be helping him, but all she was doing was making things worse.

Feeling his eyes on her, she wiped away the tears dotting her eyes as best she could before looking at him with a smile. "You're right," she laughed.

She was going to help him get through this. She was going to help him even if it killed her. She owed so much to this man and if something as mundane as sleeping beside him could help, she would do it. "Good night, sensei."

And then there was a pause before Kakashi said 'night, Sakura,' but she was already asleep.

* * *

**A/N:** I'm sorry it took so long to post this chapter, the next will be up soon, I promise!

Thanks to all the first chapter's reviewers, it's great to know my work is appreciated.

Thanks a lot to moodiful819, my beta reader, as she'd done a wonderful job.


	3. A new bond

* * *

**FACING THE PAST**

**Chapter 3: A new bond**

* * *

"Mmm…" A soft contented sigh left Sakura's mouth. A ray of sunlight slipped in from the curtains, hitting her eyes and causing her to slowly wake up. Her first sleepy thought was that she couldn't quite remember the last time she had slept so well, but as soon as she opened her eyes and saw a mop of silver hair by her face, she almost fell off the bed. What was her sensei doing in her bed?!

Suddenly, she remembered the previous day's events and a pang of sadness clutched her heart. She relived the pain from the night before when she realized how broken Kakashi was. But in spite of his conditions, he still tried to look strong to not worry her. The fact he cared for her like he always had even when in such pain made her happy and sad at the same time. She was sure there were not many men like him and, as she realized that, her admiration for him increased tenfold. Her only hope was to be strong enough to help him out of this.

The thought made her feel helpless as all her insecurities took over. What if she couldn't help him? What if he stayed like this forever? What if he became worse? But it lasted just a moment. She soon regained her footing and took a deep intake of air to calm down. She was getting ahead of herself. Kakashi was stronger than that and if she was going to help him, she couldn't let herself think about those things. Otherwise, he really would never get better.

She lowered her head to look at him, watching as he slept peacefully. The sight made her feel a little better and she instinctively tightened her embrace on him and closed her eyes. "Sensei…" she whispered.

A few moments passed and she decided to dismiss the thoughts hovering over her mind. She didn't want Kakashi to find her depressed when he woke up. If that did happen, he'd spend his time trying to help her when it was supposed to be the other way around. So she moved on less serious matters. Luckily, he was still asleep, so he didn't see her earlier shocked reaction. It would have been quite embarrassing explaining her outburst to him. I mean, how would you tell your former sensei that you had slept so well you forgot you weren't in your own bed?! She giggled a little at that. She had to admit it was really pleasant to sleep cuddled with a man, as weird it was since the man was her sensei. Sleeping with someone you loved would be even better, she absently mused.

'Maybe I really should try to find a boyfriend…' she thought.

Meanwhile, Kakashi slowly opened his eyes and lifted his head until he was at eye level with her. He gave her a warm smile. "Good morning, nurse. Mind if I call you that?" His voice was sleepy but firm, no trace of the last night's tremor to be found. In fact, the teasing note in his voice was back.

It took a few moments to her to reply, lost in that beautiful smile of his. 'Sakura, stop it. It's just a face!' she had to tell herself before being able to speak again.

"No, it sounds good to me. But I find it's a quite strange request…" she said, letting a bit of her curiosity leak into her tone.

"Well, you are of the medical profession. Besides, it helps with the awkwardness since we're sleeping in the same bed," he explained.

"Thanks…I guess. Actually, it makes sense since you are under treatment—weird treatment that it is—so I guess it's alright."

"Thank you, nurse," he smiled. "At least, I hope you slept well. I thought I wouldn't be able to sleep since you were in the bed, but guess I was wrong." He gave his signature eye-crinkled smile and for the first time, Sakura was able to see it on his whole face. It was cute and she couldn't help the blush creeping into her cheeks.

'Oh Kami, it's just a smile! Sakura, get a grip!' she screamed at herself. This blush thing was getting out of hand. 'Well, at least he's in a good mood this morning. Maybe he's starting to feel better,' she mused. Then she recalled the end of his sentence. 'Hey! Is it possible…?'

"Sensei, did you just admit that you've never slept with someone before?"

"Well, I've had sex, but I was usually gone before the spooning part came in. Part of the whole 'one-night stand' deal, you know," he said with a teasing smile and immediately, Sakura could feel the blush spreading over her cheeks. Well, at least this time it wasn't due to his looks.

"Sensei, I didn't need to know that! God, keep your sex life to yourself! Do you know how disturbing it is to hear about your sensei's sex life? It's like hearing about your parents' sex life!" He chuckled at that. It was so easy to tease her, which was probably why he did it so much.

"But does this mean that you've never had a real girlfriend?" Her curiosity outweighed her embarrassment.

"No. As you know, I'm not the social type, so one-night stands are easier for me. It isn't a big deal. We both get what we want and no one gets hurt because no emotions are involved. Even if it was more than one night, it was still the same. Go to the room, have sex, then leave before she wakes up. It's just that today was the first time I actually woke up with someone in my bed." This time he was grinning slyly, amused at her reactions.

"Oh…" she said trying to keep the red flush from her cheeks. She wasn't going to let him have the satisfaction of seeing her blush since he'd only tease her further. "Well, it had been the first time for me too—sleeping with someone, I mean."

"Really? I didn't think you were into one-night stands," he said genuinely curious. 'It seems she's not my young and innocent little pink kunoichi anymore, after all…'

It wasn't like he thought that she was still a virgin. She was twenty after all and pretty despite the strange combination of pink hair and green eyes. Then again, the combination was part of her charm and it would have been strange if there hadn't been any boy interested in her. But at the very least, he would've thought she would've lost her virginity with someone she was in love with, not just to have sex, because she seemed like that kind of girl. It shouldn't have bothered him that she chose that type of path seeing that he knew how lonely this job was, but he couldn't help giving a slightly disappointed sigh.

"What?! Oh…no, it's not like that. I mean…I've never been with a man. That's all," she said immediately averting her eyes.

'Why are we talking about this stuff? It's not something someone usually discusses with their sensei—and while we're together in bed too! This is so embarrassing. I bet my whole face is on fire right now!'

This time his sigh was from relief. 'She's more innocent than I thought. It's a bit odd for her age, but good for her. I didn't think there were many boys worth her time anyway.'

He saw the embarrassment on her face and decided to stop teasing her and change the matter. To be honest, he was really glad she was being there for him and it wouldn't be good if he chased her away with his teasing.

"Ah, I almost forgot. Please refrain from using Gai-and-snuggle comments. I'm already mentally-scarred enough." His mocking tone gave him away.

She burst out in a hearty laugh, all her embarrassment instantly forgotten.

"You're right, sensei. I'm sorry!"

"Good. Just keep that in mind."

"You know what, sensei? I'm starving! What do you think about having breakfast?"

"Sounds good to me. Let's get up. And Sakura…?"

"Yes?"

"Thank you. You didn't have to sleep here with me and you had every right to refuse, but you trusted me and took care of me. So… thanks."

And with his sweet smile, for the ninth time that morning she blushed beet-red.

* * *

"Sensei, I think you should talk to me about your nightmares…"

He was sitting on the couch and she joined him after she finished cleaning the kitchen to try and see how Kakashi felt about sharing his problems.

He immediately diverted his eyes on the floor. "I know, but I can't, really. They're about my past. It's a bit too…personal."

"I understand, but it's useless for me to stay here if you don't open up to me. Don't you remember Tsunade's words?"

"You helped me sleep last night. That's something…"

"Sensei, it's not like I can stay here forever!"

He looked at her with a curious expression and she immediately thought it was better to clarify. After all, it sounded awkward to her as well.

"I mean, you're not resolving anything that way. I know you're a reserved man, but I'm the medical professional, remember? Patient-doctor confidentiality bars me from telling anyone unless you want me to and if I ever need Tsunade's help, I'll ask you for permission first, I swear!"

"I know, Sakura. It's not like I don't trust you, but you have to understand. I've never shared my past with anyone. All the people close to me have no idea who I am and what they've heard, they didn't hear it from me."

He'd told her the boundaries. She wasn't to step over them or else she wouldn't get anything at all out of him. She had to remember to take it slowly, step by step. There was no need to rush things or he would take the defensive, so for now, she'd stop.

"I see, but if your nightmares persist for the rest of the week, then you'll have to tell me. Deal?"

He rubbed the back of his neck with a thinking expression. "Deal. Sorry, Sakura. I know it's hard to bear me..."

She gave a sigh then turned her attention to her scrolls.

The rest of the day was spent by reading and talking about a few things, most of them memories about Team 7. At one point, Kakashi asked Sakura if she was still affected when someone talked about Sasuke.

"Well, I can't say it does nothing to me, but it's not like years ago. A lot of things have changed since then."

"Such as?"

"First of all, I realize I wasn't really in love with him. I was in love with the image of him that I built in my mind. I've never really understood him—hell, I've never even tried to. He was just a handsome and mysterious boy, and I decided he had to be the love of my life. It didn't occur to me that it could be a silly infatuation brought on by curiosity.

"It's silly, right? But I guess it's not so unusual among the children, at least I hope so! When we were put on the same team, I started getting to know him better, but the more I saw, the more I hung on to my dream. He wasn't what I had imagined, but I refused to face the reality that the Sasuke in my mind was a lie and the Sasuke in front of me was real. I was so selfish and annoying to him, I can understand now why he couldn't stand me!" she said with a bitter laugh.

"Even when he left, I refused to see that he had freely chosen his path. It was useless to try to take him back by force. As his friends, we were allowed to be worried about him and try to help him—even give him advice and tell him he was ruining his life—but we couldn't decide for him. It was just selfish. Even if I disagree with his decision, I respect it now because no matter what he chooses, I have to deal with it. I owe him that much at least.

"I don't know where he is right now, but I'm just happy to know he is alive. I want him to find happiness one day, even if it could not happen here with us. It's not that I don't care anymore—I'd still die to protect him like I would for you and Naruto since Team 7 has been like a second family to me—but I won't try to force myself on him again, even if I think it's for his own good. That's what I think friendship is all about; selfless giving and just sticking with you through thick and thin."

Kakashi was speechless. Though he had friendships (more like acquaintanceships), he'd never thought about them to the extent that she did. Friends were important, he knew that, but never had it occurred to him how far he would go for them or how far they would go for him. The fact she had just told him she'd die for him was touching. Sakura had already proven him she had matured from the whiny teen who was more interested in boys than being a shinobi, but this was far beyond his expectations. She wasn't lost in romantic fantasies anymore; she had discovered reality and what was more, she had accepted it without losing her sensibility or her caring nature. It was something he couldn't say about many people and he was awed by her transformation.

"I see. You know, I think I might tell you about my life. It's not going to be easy, but I'll tell you when I think I'm ready."

"Is it really that hard for you, Kakashi-sensei?"

"It's complicated."

Little did he know that this was the first time Sakura told someone her reflections about Sasuke and what had happened. She had always kept them to herself. It was hard to put them into words and she didn't think someone would be interested in it, but speaking with Kakashi about it seemed very natural to her. The words just flowed from her mouth. She supposed it was his aloofness that calmed her down so much she was able to speak about anything. She realized she could have told him everything that passed in her head without any hesitation, so she made a mental note to look for him in future when she would have need to tell her feelings to someone.

* * *

That night, he had another nightmare and she ended up sharing a bed with him again. She waited for him to calm down a little and then she tried to lighten his mood a bit before falling asleep.

"I wonder if this isn't just a rouse to sleep with a young woman, you old man. After all, we all know how perverted you are with all those smut books of yours…"

He chuckled at this. "Like I would go after you. Sorry Sakura, but you aren't the hot little number you think you are." Despite his callous words, his tone was teasing. She guessed she deserved it. Her crack at him wasn't exactly the most graceful thing she could've said, but she was glad he took it in stride.

"Well, at least you've still got some mirth…"

"You know it's only because you're here with me," he replied, his tone serious this time. "Thank you, nurse."

"You're welcome. Good night, Kakashi-sensei."

"Good night, Sakura."

Both of them were strangely a bit depressed after this last joke. Even if they had only been living together for a day and a half, they were enjoying this new companionship (aside the nightmare problems, of course), and the prospect of going back to their old lives seemed strangely unpleasant. Kakashi blamed it on the fact he was enjoying being pampered by someone, but refused to question whether or not it was because that someone was Sakura.

Sakura, on the other hand, thought it was nice to live with someone instead of always eating and sleeping alone. There was only so much silence a person could take before it became stifling, but like Kakashi, she refused to ask herself if it would be the same with anyone else or if it was just with her sensei.

'Former sensei,' she corrected herself. 'Oops! Where did that come from? I've never cared before!'

* * *

**A/N:** In Naruto's world there are TVs, electronic games, trains but other things like cars, guns, etc., don't exist. I have arbitrarily decided that they don't know sedatives or tranquillizers either.

Thanks again to my beta reader moodiful819. Great job!


	4. A visit and a bet

* * *

**FACING THE PAST**

**Chapter 4: A visit and a bet**

* * *

That morning Kakashi woke up to a sleeping Sakura. He had woken up before her and stayed still so he wouldn't wake her up, finding himself gazing intently at her sleeping visage. The simple gesture alone was able to give him such a feeling of peace that he gladly lingered in his bed to watch her. He was amazed at how at ease he felt. He never let anyone get so close to him, let alone stay in his own apartment. It was his safe haven, where no one could follow or bother him. Even with his occasional one-night stands, he had always been the one who went to the woman's place, not the other way around.

And now here he was, sharing his bed with this pink-haired nurse, not to mention his former student. It could have been an interesting starting point for a new Icha Icha story, he slyly mused, but not with this particular nurse, though. It would have been just too awkward. Even if she looked adorable with her bed-head…

He didn't know how long he watched her for before she woke up, but he knew he could have stayed like that all the day without getting bored.

The day passed like the one before: eating together, reading and chatting. This time they talked about Sakura's work, between hospital shifts and missions. He knew nothing about medicine, but he found the conversation quite interesting because she explained everything so simply. After the conversation, he was beginning to think that maybe hospitals weren't so bad after all, as long as she worked there.

That afternoon, Tsunade came to pay him a visit.

"How are you, Kakashi?"

"Fine. As long as I'm awake, that is. I still have the nightmares when I sleep, but I'm doing alright."

"I see…" She eyed him carefully. "But you don't seem to be sleep-deprived at all. Why?"

At this, Sakura blushed madly and averted her eyes while Kakashi lost his composure in the form of a slight twitch. To anyone else, this would've seemed like nothing, but to someone who knew Kakashi, this was a sign of him losing his nerve.

Tsunade frowned at their reactions. "Is there something you're not telling me?" she asked, her eyes narrowed.

"Well…you see, shishou, when he started having the nightmares and screaming, I woke him up, but he wasn't able to fall back asleep, so…" her voice drifted away; Kakashi intervened to help her.

"I asked her to sleep with me. Not in the sexual meaning, might I add. But as much as I tried to deal with it, I couldn't help it. And as soon as Sakura slept near me, I was out like a light and I didn't have the nightmares anymore."

Despite the discomfort and awkwardness he felt for having to admit his weakness in front of someone else—the Hokage nonetheless—he kept his gaze steady with Tsunade's. She had to know this was the truth.

Tsunade's eyes widened. "I…I'd never thought…" She was speechless.

An awkward silence fell over the trio. Then Tsunade regained her ability to speak. "Are you okay with this, Sakura?"

This time, she didn't hesitate. "Yes, shishou. He hasn't tried anything on me and all contact has been on a purely professional level. We simply slept in the same bed, that's all. To be honest, I don't know how else to help him."

Tsunade took note of what Sakura said and knew it was the truth. Despite Kakashi's bad reputation, she knew he cared for his student and that he would never force himself on her. Still, this wasn't going to solve his problems, it was just a temporary comfort.

"Kakashi, do you remember what I said? That you're the only one who can fix your problems?"

"Yes, Tsunade-sama, I remember. I just need a little more time. For me to talk about what happened, I'd have to tell you about my past. That's something I'm not ready for. Besides, it'd kind of ruin the whole 'mysterious figure thing' I have going for me," he joked, but his laugh was empty.

Tsunade sighed and touched her hand to her forming headache. "Still have that impeccable timing for humor, I see. But all kidding aside, Kakashi, you really should face your problems. You can't hide from them forever. Remember that."

"I know."

Sakura sensed Kakashi's discomfort and intervened. "Tsunade-shishou, we've been getting to know each other better. I'm sure he'll open up to me when he's ready. He promised me, right sensei?"

Kakashi cast a side-glance towards her and smiled gratefully. "Right, Sakura."

She smiled him back in understanding.

"Let's hope," was Tsunade's comment. She saw the little interaction between the two, and she was surprised by Kakashi's complicity with his ex-student. 'They really are bonding, it seems.'

"Thank you, Tsunade-shishou," Sakura bowed politely.

"Ah, I almost forgot…a lot of people are asking about you, Kakashi. Can I tell them they can pay you a visit?"

He pondered about it. He didn't want to have people going around in his home—they had a tendency to pry—but he was afraid Sakura would get bored eventually since it was only the two of them. Maybe he could stand having just a few people over to provide her some distraction every now and then.

"Just the closest ones, please. Naruto, Genma, Yamato…maybe Gai—no, _not_ Gai. I don't think I could stand him right now," he mumbled the last part before shuddering slightly at the thought of his friend/rival's antics. Sakura's last comment about Gai and snuggling didn't help either.

"All right. And Sakura, you really should call your parents. I think they'll be worried about you living here."

Sakura's eyes widened in realization. "Oh Kami, I completely forgot to tell them!"

Tsunade laughed before standing up from the chair, about to leave when she paused before the door. The information she had gotten earlier that afternoon, about them sleeping together, kept dancing in her mind throughout the visit. And the closeness they showed with those little interactions of theirs! Well, it wasn't deeply intimate, but being that one of the parties was the Hatake Kakashi, it was something to be surprised about.

Suddenly, Tsunade was struck with a wicked little idea. Sure, there could be a backlash from her plan in the form of lost limbs or being kicked out, but she could heal herself and on top of that, she was their boss.

"You know, there are some bets floating around the village about the two of you living together. After all, we all know about Kakashi's obsession with his books. Now that I know you do sleep together, I think I should change my bet." Although she didn't turn to face them, she could already imagine how flustered Sakura's expression would be.

Kakashi just smirked, but just as Tsunade predicted, Sakura was as red as a tomato. "WHAT?! You're not going to tell anyone we're sleeping together, are you?"

Tsunade burst out into laughter.

"Of course not! It'd spoil the bet! Besides, I already wagered about you two having sex within a couple of months. I'm just going to double the stake." With that, she left, still laughing. After all, even a Hokage needed to have some fun every now and then, she told herself.

Truth to be told, there wasn't any bet going on about Kakashi and Sakura. Their friends knew better than to get them angry by starting something like that, but Tsunade was sure at least half the village was wondering if something would actually happen between the two and she decided to make a bet with her old friend, Jiraiya. She knew him well enough to know that he would take the opportunity of proposing the same bet to the other shinobi. At this point, the entire village would have wagered on it. An amused laugh escaped her lips.

But she was also determined to bet in their favor, for she had never seen Kakashi so close to anyone. Sure, he still hadn't opened up to her, but the simple fact that he was so clearly at ease with someone in his own home was stunning. And as she walked back to Hokage tower, she wondered about something. Now that he let Sakura cross his barriers, would he be able to push her out of his private life?

* * *

"Can you believe it?!" Sakura screamed as she flopped down wearily on the couch. The pink-haired medic shook her head at her teacher's words. They had been so left-field that she didn't even burst into her normal violent reaction, which was a relief for both Kakashi and his apartment. The girl could have easily opened a hole in the wall without even trying.

They ate dinner in an awkward silence, as Sakura was still shocked by the earlier events, then they sat on the coach together. Kakashi thought it was now safe to try and soothe her.

"You know, you shouldn't worry about the bet. Nothing's going happen. If you think about it, it is funny, isn't it? I'm what—14 years your senior, and your ex-sensei! There's no way you can be attracted to me!" His voice was cheerful, but inside, he was slightly disappointed by his own words. He decided to ignore the awkward feeling and went on. "You still call me sensei even if we are teammates now and you haven't been my student for 7 years. That alone pretty much sums up our relationship: friends and teacher-student. People are just making silly insinuations. They probably don't even believe what they're saying in the first place."

"I know, but… if they find out we slept together—"

"Tsunade would never tell anyone about it. Like she said, it would spoil the bet. Aside from that, she isn't allowed to talk about it since this is therapy-related and there're patient-confidentiality agreements in place. People would have to spy on us to find out anything and if they did, they'd see that nothing happened. All they'd see is gentlemanly behavior since I can't exactly kick you out onto the floor, though I can't say the same about you," he said teasingly, garnering a chuckle from his companion before it faded away.

Seeing that Sakura was still worried, Kakashi brought his hand to her cheek, letting his fingers trace over the skin.

"Sakura, look at me." His voice was deeper then usual, concern evident in his tone.

She raised her eyes to his, a shiver running down her spine.

"We've done nothing wrong. You're just helping me and I'm happy—really happy—about having you by my side while I go through this. This isn't a bad thing. You're not being a bad person. You're just helping out an old friend, and I'm glad you're taking care of me."

She had barely registered his words. She was too busy focusing on the strange thoughts and intense sensations that raced across her mind. They had been happening a lot lately and they were always small things. Things she never would have really noticed before like the shivers she felt from his touch. This had never happened to her while she was dating. Was this really only friendly affection?

She noticed he was still waiting for her answer and quickly dismissed these thoughts.

"Thanks, Kakashi-sensei. I think I just overreacted a bit."

"You're welcome. So, will you sleep with me tonight?" he grinned slyly.

"What?! Are you kidding me?"

"I meant sharing a bed." He gave a short laugh. "My my, I never would've guessed that the village cherry blossom is a closet pervert."

"Am not! And if I am, it's because you were reading those damn porno books of yours in my face."

"I thought you'd appreciate being introduced to sex."

"We were twelve, old man!"

"That's generally when puberty starts. I thought you learned this during your medic training. And sex is a perfectly natural part of life, Sakura. There's nothing to be ashamed about, unless…"

"Unless what?"

"Sakura, do we need to have…_the talk?_"

Sakura's answer was a shrill shriek followed by a seat cushion to his face. "You jerk!"

Kakashi laughed good-naturedly. "Well, all kidding aside, it's getting late. We should get to bed."

"I guess you're right…"

Later that night, Sakura was puzzled. This time there was no real reason for them to be sharing this bed. With no nightmare, it was almost like she was doing this because she wanted to, and it scared her because she was enjoying it. Was it because Kakashi had grown from acquaintance to friend, or had it become more?

'What does this mean?'

What Sakura didn't know was that Kakashi was wondering the exact same thing. But eventually, they managed to drift into peaceful slumber. But the next morning, another thing had changed between them. Usually, she woke up facing Kakashi, but now he was spooning her, his arm under her neck and the other around her waist.

'This is awkward,' she thought to herself. Their bodies were completely touching, but strangely, she didn't feel worried or upset. Her back was warm thanks to his body and it felt…nice. The only thing she didn't like about it was not being able to see his face.

Unbeknownst to Sakura, Kakashi was also awake, silently thanking Kami for not having that little problem all men had in the morning. Sure, she already knew about that aspect of the male species from her medical studies (and if not that, then all her years with Team 7), but it still would have been very awkward to deal with the situation. And smiling at his good fortune, he simply let himself enjoy what was looking to be a very good day.

* * *

The next days passed without incident and Sakura even managed to stop staring at his face now that she was used to it (though it did little to detract from how gorgeous he looked).

After Tsunade's visit, Kakashi told her to not allow anyone to visit him since he didn't want anyone to tease Sakura about the bet. He could handle rumors just fine, but he wasn't sure about Sakura, so it was always the two of them.

Another thing was that he didn't seem to be having the nightmares, but they didn't know if it was because Sakura was there or because he was finally cured.

So on the seventh night since the last nightmare, she told him to sleep alone. Suffice it to say, Kakashi wasn't very happy about it.

"We have to see if you really are doing better or if it's just because we're sleeping together."

Kakashi scratched the back of his neck. "You're right, but—"

"Sensei, you know this is for your own good."

"I know, but still I— "

"But nothing!" She was sick of his excuses. It was time to see how he was really doing, and the fact he was acting so stubborn sparked her famous temper. "Kakashi, stop acting like a child!" she snapped. She immediately regretted her words, but it was too late. The only thing she could do now was cross her arms over her chest and keep to her decision.

Kakashi should have felt irritated by her words—and on any other occasion, he would have—but even he knew she was right. They had to know if he was getting any better and honestly, when did he become such a child that he couldn't sleep by himself? Since when did he care so much if she was in bed with him or not? Sure, having her in his bed was nice; the bed was always warm, she didn't snore like Naruto, and it was nice in general (plus, no nightmares), but sleeping by himself for once wouldn't kill him.

So why did he feel so disappointed?

He sighed. He should have known that letting someone get close to him wouldn't be good for himself. He had grown fond to Sakura's presence in these past few days and now he was growing dependent. He needed to put a stop to all this before the whole situation got out of hand. If he had another nightmare that night, then he would talk to her about it the next morning. By that point, she'd be back in her own home and she'd return back to her old life. Even if the nightmares kept happening, he'd just lie and smile and tough it out. Sakura deserved a better life than being his babysitter and if he had to suffer to make sure she had a better life, it was a small price to pay.

Sakura saw Kakashi was deep in his thoughts. She expected him to scold her outburst. Even if she had been right, she had gone too far. Kakashi's voice snapped her from her own thoughts.

"You're right. Good night, Sakura." His voice was curt. Though he was angry with himself for his newfound weakness, Sakura mistook it, thinking he was mad at her. Lowering her head, she nodded.

"I'll come if you'll have a nightmare, don't worry," she assured him, her voice quieter than before.

At the guilt in her voice, he felt something in his heart break. It was as if his soul was being pulled towards her, but he stopped himself. If he got any closer to her, there was no way he could ever push her out of his life.

He quickly nodded without turning to her and entered his bedroom, closing the door. 'This can't be good,' he told himself as he leaned against the door, but quickly shook the thoughts aside. 'I'm doing this for her.'

As soon as he disappeared behind the door, her temper took hold of her again. 'That nerve of that man! I try to help him and he acts like a selfish child! To think I saw him as a hero, an invincible man!' she thought angrily.

"Ah… but I guess I like this more human side to him too…" she sighed, her anger immediately dissolving as she recalled the memories of the past few days, a smile on her face.

Then she heard it, the blood-curdling shriek coming from the bedroom.

'So he wasn't healed after all,' she thought. She rushed to his bedroom and woke him up, watching him slowly come back to the land of the waking. A cold sweat coated his skin and she could hear his shallow breathing and his heart thudding rapidly against his chest. Reaching down, she hugged him and didn't pull away when he returned the gesture. Shifting her legs onto the bed, she held him and they fell asleep together once again.

* * *

**A/N:** yeah, yeah, I know you're curious about the woman who did this to Kakashi. But I figured out Tsunade wouldn't tell him anything until he's fine again, in order to not further trouble him. You'll find out something more in the next chapters…

Thanks to Moodiful819 for her great editing work… this story wouldn't be so good without her, believe me!

If you're looking for a less serious story, try **A lesson in seduction**! It's a Romantic/Humor KakaSaku fic and it's already completed!


	5. Painful memories

**

* * *

**

FACING THE PAST

**Chapter 5: Painful memories**

* * *

Kakashi was gazing at Sakura as always, waiting for her to wake up. He liked this new routine of theirs, waking up early and watching her wake up held tightly in his arms. Kakashi shook his head. He couldn't let this continue. It was way too dangerous.

Eventually, she woke up and glanced up at him, a small smile gracing her features. She liked this routine of theirs as well.

"Good morning, nurse Sakura. It seems you were right, after all."

Her good mood vanished the minute those words left his mouth.

"Yes…" she said lowering her eyes, only to dart them back right after. "Oh, I'm so sorry, sensei. I really wished you were doing better…"

He chuckled briefly, causing her to huff.

"What's so funny?"

"You." He answered, chuckling again. "I'm sorry Sakura, but sometimes you sound more like a worried mother with her little baby than a professional nurse—Ouch!" A thrust of her elbow into his ribs cut off the rest of his sentence.

"Serves you right, sensei," Sakura said slightly annoyed.

"Uh, so mean, nurse Sakura…" Kakashi complained.

"I was really worried about you, you know? Why the hell do you think I put up dealing with you 24 hours a day?!" The threatening glare radiating from the narrow slits of her eyes would have frozen any lesser man on the spot, but Kakashi was Kakashi, and he just laughed it off.

Eyeing her carefully, he decided she was not in the mood and thought better than to keep teasing her, quickly tightening his arms around her and resting his chin on top of her head. "I know, Sakura. I was just kidding."

She huffed again, but soon buried her face in his neck and relaxed in his embrace.

They stayed like that for a while, enjoying their closeness and each other's warmth. They lost themselves in the sensation; as if time and space had faded to just the two of them. As soon as Kakashi became aware of whatever it was they were sharing—he couldn't really find a way to describe it—he berated himself once again and loosened his grip on her. He really needed to put some distance between the two of them.

Feeling him pull away, she came back to reality blushing furiously; she tried to stand up. His arms didn't let go.

"Wait. We need to talk."

"Here?" Her pink brow arched slightly with her voice.

"Why not?" he asked as he tried to ignore the swirling feelings of anxiety in his stomach. The moment he dreaded most had arrived and he was in deep trouble. Her embrace had always managed to soothe him, so he hoped it would be easier to open up that way.

Resting his forehead on hers, he began to speak.

"Sakura, have you ever heard about a man named Hatake Sakumo?"

"Of course I have! The White Fang, Hatake Sakumo, is a legend in our village! I've heard his name a few times when I was a child."

"He was my father."

Sakura's eyes widened.

"He was very famous in the village; his strength was even comparable to that of the Sannin. He was my hero, but once, he gave up a mission in order to save his teammates' life and because of his actions, Konoha paid heavy consequences. The village charged him for it, and even the teammates he saved scorned him. After that, he became a recluse and one day, took his own life." His voice hushed at the end and in his eyes, she could see the memories of those days playing out before him. It took a few moments for him to regain his speech while Sakura fought the lump forming in her throat. She wasn't going to be weak. She had to be strong for the both of them.

"I was called a prodigy in the academy and I graduated when I was still a child, but the day my father died, a part of me died with him. My whole world crumbled and I became emotionless. Back then, my goal was to become a strong shinobi as soon as possible. I swore to myself that I would never fail like he did and I memorized the shinobi rule book, word for word and followed the codes religiously; I would not make the same mistakes as my father. It was then that I also began to wear my mask. It was partially due to the reason that shinobi don't show their emotions and I wasn't very good at concealing the pain I felt inside back; the mask helped me to hide my feelings. But another reason I did it was because I looked just like my father and I felt so much shame whenever I looked at myself that I just couldn't take it. His legacy followed me everywhere and I spent my entire childhood trying to erase him from me.

"I became a jounin at the same age you and the boys graduated at the academy, you know," he mentioned off-handedly.

Sakura gasped. _'Jounin at twelve!!!' _she thought, _'That's impossible!!!'_

He saw her surprise and grinned. "It's true. Granted, I was a prodigy, but I have the feeling it was for another reason that I was granted that rank at such a young age. We were at war, and the village needed every capable shinobi it could get its hands on. If we hadn't been at war, I have the feeling things would've been different for me," he said wistfully, "but as you can see, my goal was accomplished. I had become a full-fledged jounin. I had the title and the respect, and I could finally wipe my father's stigma from me.

"As I mentioned earlier, we were fighting the third Great Shinobi War at the time and I was sent with my team in a mission. My leader and ex-teacher was the soon-to-be Yondaime Hokage and he put me in charge of command. We had a medic-nin, Rin, and then there was Uchiha Obito. Despite being an Uchiha, he was actually quite the idiot. In a way, we were exactly like Sasuke and Naruto. We just couldn't stand each other at all," Kakashi said, a chuckle escaping him at the memory.

"He was always late and would come up with the most absurd excuses each time. Besides, he was quite weak—his sharingan still hadn't activated—and he was also a whiner, the complete opposite of me, but he had a great heart; something I hadn't realized until it was almost too late …"

Sakura couldn't help but give a small smile.

"What's that for, Sakura?"

"Always late and absurd excuses… it reminds me of someone." She playfully winked at him.

He chuckled and scratched the back of his neck sheepishly. "Yeah, I kind of adopted those things after I adopted his eye…"

"You what?!?" Sakura's eyes were wide in surprise.

"Calm down Sakura, one step at a time…"

"Oh, sorry…please, go on."

"We split in two groups: Obito, Rin, and I were one group, and our teacher was another. Our mission objective was to destroy a bridge and interrupt the enemy's supply line, but after a while, Rin was kidnapped by our enemies. Obito wanted to save her, but it would have meant delaying the mission and we had to get there before the supplies did. It was the same situation my father had found himself in years before and I didn't dare make the same mistake. If his death had taught me anything, it was that failing to complete a mission was absolutely unforgivable and that you had to finish it no matter what, even at the expense of a teammate's life.

"But Obito said something that changed forever my life. He said my father was a true hero. He said that even if in the ninja world those who don't follow the rules are trash, those who leave behind their teammates are the worst kind of trash. That's why if he was going to be trash in any case, he was more than willing to break the rules and save Rin. And with that, he, the ever-whiny, pathetic Obito, evolved into something more and sped off to her rescue all alone. Truth be told, he was in love with her, so that probably helped him, but nonetheless he went alone.

"Did you know he also said that one day he would like to change the rules? He reminds me a little of Naruto." Kakashi's expression softened a little and Sakura gave him another small smile.

"I was utterly torn on what to do. My sensei had always told me that rules were important, yes; but teamwork was important as well. But on the other hand I had my father's tragic fate. As I stood there deciding, I could feel his memory lingering on my shoulders. Eventually I decided to go after Obito, but in saving him I lost my left eye. Even so, I didn't really care. We were a real team now, and Obito knew I finally understood him. That same day, Obito's sharingan activated and thanks to it, we were able to save Rin. But when we were trying to get away, one of our enemies made the cave we were in crumble. One of the boulders became dislodged and was falling straight towards me, but I didn't see it because of my bandaged eye. Obito pushed me out of the way and saved me. But he was caught under the rock instead."

A pause. The air around him felt tense. His shoulders rose and fell with his breaths as he struggled to find the words he wanted to say.

"It should have been me that day…" he whispered at last.

Sakura saw a single tear escaping his dark eye, and then he hid his face in her shoulder. To anyone else, it would've seemed that Kakashi was merely resting his head on her shoulder in exhaustion, but she knew he was crying, the slight quivering of his frame and the moisture on her shirt betraying that fact. He had thought about that moment countless times before, but voicing it was different.

It was _unbearable_.

Sakura's heart clenched at the memory of their first night together. She had felt so useless back then and she hugged him tighter, tracing light circles on his back in a bid to comfort him. She would have whispered soothing words to his ear, but she didn't. Not only would it have felt shallow and cheapened somehow, she didn't trust her own voice.

More than his sad story, what was tearing her apart was seeing him like that. Despite knowing him for years, she never realized he had so much pain inside of him. It made her realize how little she really knew and understood about the man, and suddenly her title of "friend" seemed like some cheap lie.

He calmed down a bit, slowly lifting his head up again; Sakura gave him a soft peck on the forehead before he could bring it to touch hers again. It was her way to say she was close to him and she would have never left him alone. Never.

They stayed like that for a while, until Kakashi's sobs completely subsided and he resumed his story.

"Did you know that Obito had been the only team member who didn't give me a gift for my promotion? He asked Rin to transplant his left eye into me to make up for it. He said even if he was going to die, he would have become my eye and he would have kept on seeing the world through me. All I could think of was 'what the hell is he saying?' Was he just saying that so he could say something cool to be remembered by when he died? The idiot was dying and all he cared about was my present—about me, the guy who almost left him. I didn't know whether to laugh as hard as I could or cry as hard as I could."

Another pause; a strangled choking sound left his throat.

"More enemies arrived—probably having seen the rock formation collapse. I fought them to save Rin like I had promised to Obito, but we were outnumbered. We had to leave his body there. We almost didn't make it, but thanks to the sharingan, I improved my Chidori, but it wasn't enough. And just when I thought we were going to die, sensei saved us. I'd never been more relieved in my life."

"That night, Rin tried to confess to me. I knew what she was going to say—that she loved me—that she wouldn't accept anyone in her heart but me—but I cut her off. Even if I cared for her, I didn't deserve her love. I was the guy who thought about leaving her to the enemy. Obito was the one who really deserved it, but he was dead, and we both knew he was never going to come back. I don't know if she ever forgave me for that—I just tried to keep her safe because of my promise to Obito—but a few months later, Rin died during a mission with another team. And after that, sensei died saving the village from the Kyuubi. And after that…there isn't much to say..."

They didn't speak for a while, merely holding each other. She could feel his warmth flowing through her body and knew he felt the same for her before she felt his lips move over her hair.

"Do you know why I'm always late, Sakura?"

"Why?" she asked.

"Every morning at dawn, I go to the memorial stone to see Obito, Rin and sensei. Unfortunately my father isn't there because he committed suicide and didn't die in the field, but when I'm there, I think of him, too… I stay there for hours, just wondering how I could've missed how important these people were to me."

"Sensei…"

"So what do you think about me, Sakura? I can be a skilled shinobi, but I'm more of a poor excuse of a man than anything else. Are you really willing to stay by me now?" His eyes were holding hers.

"It's not like that, sensei. I'm not here because I pity you; I'm here because you're the one I've always looked up to. You're a great man and I admire you, sensei. Knowing your painful past and the man you've become from it only increases my admiration for you. Your past doesn't make you weaker; it makes you stronger because you've managed to live through it. Personally, I think I never would have been able to survive it."

"It's not like that, Sakura. When Sasuke left, you didn't close your heart to the world. You became a stronger kunoichi from that experience, but also remained a caring and loving person. That's why you are now able to speak about Sasuke again, while I'm unable to do the same about my past."

"But that was just a stupid childish crush, sensei; nothing compared to what you had to face!"

"But you were in pain, nonetheless. After even my sensei died, I swore I would never love anyone else and I closed my heart to the world. The loss of someone you love—be it a father, a friend, a teammate or a sensei—is painful. Even the people I call friends are not really that close to me, and for the same reason I've never had a girlfriend. I've never let anyone come close to me. I kept living only to serve my village and to mourn their loss."

"But you've always cared for me, Naruto, and Sasuke! You've even risked your own life to save ours!" she shouted.

"Yes, I care for my teammates, mostly thanks to my father's and Obito's example, but I'm not able to love, create friendship, or open myself to others. My stoicism is not due to my strength. I act in a lazy manner; I keep my nose always buried in Icha Icha novels; and I hide my face just to keep some distance from people. It's something I've always succeeded in, but it's only now do I realize that I'm just a coward and nothing more. It's like I've been running away from people all these years…"

"I think you just should let it go, sensei. I'm not saying to forget them because they deserve to live on in your memories, but you should forgive yourself. Obito told you he would still see the world through you, but you're only showing him pain. Do you really think he would have given his life to save yours if he knew you would have wasted it this way? You should be thankful to him and be happy to be alive so that his sacrifice isn't in vain. You deserve to be happy, both for yourself and for him. Please sensei, yearn for happiness; learn how to live again…"

Kakashi was shocked. As her words slowly sunk in him, he felt like his eyes were opened for the first time in years. Until now, he'd just lived to mourn them, thinking he didn't deserve to be alive while they were all dead. He had never thought he could honor Obito's sacrifice and show him happiness by being happy himself. It was a whole different point of view.

"Sakura…" he stopped himself not trusting his voice. His eyes were once again full of tears, but this time they weren't from pain. He was feeling a strange sensation. Was it hope? He didn't know; he just knew he was feeling warm all of a sudden, as if he wasn't alone for the first time in so many years.

Suddenly, he kissed her.

It was just a chaste peck on the lips, given out of instinct. Call it gratefulness, call it hope, call it a return to life—whatever you want, but he still did it and he was happy. He knew he owed it to Sakura; all his walls crumbled under the sweetness and caring of the young woman he held in his arms, and for once he didn't see it as wrong or dangerous. He was genuinely happy.

A bright smile made its way to her face, along with a deep blush.

He embraced her so tightly that she almost choked, but she didn't mind. She was happy too; happy for him to have opened his heart to her; happy for having been able to help him someway; happy at his kiss. Oh, how she wanted to stay like that forever!

* * *

Though it had not been forever, they laid there in each other's arms for a good hour. They didn't speak; they simply enjoyed each other's company.

Eventually, Kakashi broke the silence.

"Sakura, could you do me a favor?"

"What is it?"

"Could you stop calling me 'sensei'? Aside the fact I haven't taught you in years, I don't think it suits our friendship anymore. I really don't see you as a student anymore."

"Fine, but I don't know what else to call you. After all, you're still my team leader. Mm…what about Kakashi-taichou? Or maybe Kakashi-senpai? Yamato-taichou calls you that way, doesn't he?"

"When we're on duty, you can do that, but when we're like this, I'd just like Kakashi."

"All right, Kakashi," she said with a sweet smile that lit up her already beautiful visage.

Strange enough, she instantly got used to the lack of honorific. These days, she had learned to see the man in him, not just the shinobi and sensei, and she liked him all the more for it.

* * *

**A/N:** Here you go with the 5th chapter! I'm really sorry to update at a snail's pace, I hope you forgive me and enjoy the story nonetheless. :)

Thanks a lot to moodiful819 and dont' forget to review... your comments always encourage me to keep on writing!


	6. Kakashi’s recovery

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* * *

**

FACING THE PAST

**Chapter 6: Kakashi's recovery**

* * *

They ate dinner, then sat on the coach in comfortable silence.

"You know, Kakashi; you still haven't told me what that woman did to you."

"Oh, you're right, Sakura!" He sounded oddly astonished, although it only showed as his voice rising slightly in volume. Then again, it wasn't that surprising. After all, it wasn't everyday that the Copy Nin forgot something. "I guess the shock and my recovery process made me forget to tell you. We have been very busy," he said sheepishly while scratching the back of his neck.

"Or maybe it's just that your mind is not so brilliant anymore…how old are you, again?" Sakura teased.

"You don't say that when I save you on missions. You should have more respect for your poor old teacher," he said sounding wounded, but the flamboyant gesture of placing his hand over his heart gave it away; Sakura just laughed it off and Kakashi thanked Kami that she was in a good mood, or he'd be sporting a newly broken jaw right about now.

"Getting back on topic," he began, "after our departure from Konoha, that woman claimed to be starving so we stopped to eat something. She must have slipped something into my food because I fell unconscious. I didn't notice anything wrong, so it must have been tasteless and odorless.

"Anyway, when I woke up, I was tied with chakra-suppressing handcuffs and she told me about her father. She caught me in a genjutsu, making me relive all the painful things from my past over and over again. It felt like I was trapped in there for weeks, but when she finished, she told me it had only been three days. In that illusion, it was like I was physically present in front of my father, Obito, Rin and sensei, and they all blamed me for their deaths."

"But you know it's not true!" Sakura exclaimed, unable to accept that fact.

"Well, in Obito's death, I do have some responsibility. In fact, his death is the most painful for me, even if we were friends for only an hour or so. He really was a good boy, caring too, but I only saw his flaws until the very end. My worst regret is never having been his friend."

He paused for a moment, thinking back to his teammate, before snapping out of his thoughts.

"Anyway, in the genjutsu I was watching them dying without doing anything, and they were in utter pain, screaming and begging me to help them. There was nothing stopping me from doing so, but despite every fiber of my being screaming to go help them, it was like I just didn't care to. And they blamed me more and more…"

Kakashi's eyes were closed and he was seeing the whole scene again in his mind. At the end his voice cracked and Sakura quickly hugged him.

"It's ok, Kakashi, you know it's not true."

His eyes opened abruptly, as he was dragged out of the painful memory by Sakura's soft voice. "I know that, but during my nightmares I don't have any control on my mind; my thoughts aren't rational. That's what's killing me. Every time I close my eyes, I see those scenes running over and over like they are real memories, every time except when you're with me."

"But how do you feel now after telling me that?"

He looked her in the eyes. In those _beautiful_, deep green eyes, supplied his mind. 'Shit, it's not time for this,' he cursed to himself as he searched deep down in his heart. How _was_ he feeling now?

"I feel relieved, like I've taken a huge weight from my chest; and your point of view has freed me from a lot of my inner turmoil and misplaced senses of guilt. In short, you've been a great help, Sakura-chan." He offered her a small, thankful smile.

Sakura replied with one of her brightest smiles. She was really happy to have been able to help her former sensei, but she couldn't get rid of a nagging sensation buried deep down in her heart, but she tamped them down regardless. This wasn't the time to be thinking of such things when she should be happy that Kakashi was getting better.

"Good. Tonight you'll try to sleep alone again, and we'll see if you've fixed your problem."

She didn't know why it was so hard to say those words. Kakashi's recovery was supposed to be a wonderful thing, but why was she so upset at the mere thought of him not needing her anymore?

Kakashi wasn't very happy about his nurse's proposal, but managed to keep that to himself. The night before, he had been truly determined to regain some distance between him and Sakura, but that was before. Now that he had opened up to her, he wasn't so sure anymore and that fact alone alarmed him all the more. He was afraid it was too late to get away from her. She was the only one who had been able to ease his pain all these years. She was important now—too important—and that dependency might have just become his downfall.

'Shit.'

* * *

Kakashi couldn't sleep. It was rare that he was unable to sleep, but given his recent circumstances, he supposed it should have been no surprise. Flopping onto his side, he gave a disgruntled sigh and looked at the clock. In small, red numbers, it told him it was three in the morning.

Kakashi sighed once more in aggravation. Despite feeling tired, he just couldn't go to sleep. The worst part was that he knew the reason: he missed her. In these past few days, he had gotten used to sleeping next to Sakura and without her presence by his side, he couldn't sleep. Last night, his anger towards himself helped him not to think of her, but now it was an entirely different situation. With her, he felt closer to her than any other person he knew.

Besides her warm body, he missed her scent too. With contact cut off, it was beginning to sink in just how much he had grown fond of it. He groaned. He was really in trouble now.

What he didn't know was that Sakura was feeling the same way he was.

"Sakura, are you sleeping?" Kakashi had asked in a bare whisper, so as not to disturb her if she was sleeping. He had given up sleeping and had crept out the couch where she was staying for the night.

"…No. I couldn't sleep," was the reply.

"Neither could I." He paused, sighing. "To be honest, I miss you. It's odd not having you beside me when I sleep."

She smiled to herself in the dark. He missed her? "I miss you too, Kakashi, but we both know you have to try to sleep alone."

"I know," he said a bit more curtly than he had meant to, adding to his unease about seeming like a frightened child after a nightmare, "I just thought a little distraction could help me ease my mind."

The underlying tone he used told Sakura that he was implying something she wouldn't have liked.

"Distraction?" she asked arching her brow.

"Yeah, you know…peeping, for example. It's a shame you don't sleep in only your underwear," he said offhandedly, but she knew that under his silver hair, his mind was spinning wicked thoughts.

A cushion aimed at his face was her only response.

"I was kidding, Sakura!" he said lifting his hands up to show he meant no harm.

"Well, you shouldn't mess with me when I'm half asleep," she grunted.

"But I was thinking…if I can't sleep, it's useless to stay apart, don't you think?" Shit, his sleep-fogged mind was playing tricks on him. Where was his determination?

"Kakashi, you have to get used to sleep alone again—unless you want to marry me, that is!"

His eyes grew wide and he was speechless.

"Kidding, Kakashi. Just kidding." A sound yawn echoed between them and Sakura blinked her eyes sleepily. "Serves you right."

He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding. Was it because of the joke? Or was it because he was afraid she found out his feelings towards her? He didn't know, but he gave up trying to figure it out. It wouldn't be good for him to stay on that subject for long.

"All right then, I'll go back to sleep."

"Good night, Kakashi."

"Good night, Sakura."

Eventually, he managed to fall asleep. Even though it was already four in the morning, he slept enough to dream, and though he would usually have a nightmare, this dream certainly wasn't a nightmare. In fact, he dreamed about Sakura, and the situation was almost worthy of being mistaken for a chapter from his favorite dirty novel. And when it was over and he woke up, he found himself dealing with the problem all males had while dreaming of such things; he cursed to himself.

'I can't believe I dreamed something like that! She's Sakura, for Kami's sake! Even if I see her now in a new light and not as my student anymore, she's still fourteen years my junior; it's not like I can try anything on her! At least I didn't have a nightmare tonight. This way, we won't have to share a bed again. I don't think I can trust myself anymore.'

But his heart, and—truth to be told—his perverted side, didn't agree with his rational thoughts, literally screaming their disagreement in the back of his mind, troubling him all the more.

Burying his hands in his hair, he sighed in frustration. 'No, no, no, what kind of idiot am I?! I can't let her find out I'm attracted to her. I'd lose her trust. She's the only person I can talk to freely; the only one I've let see me vulnerable; the only one I feel close to. And as much as I'd like to cut off contact with her, I've grown too attached to her. I'd never be able to do it.'

There was no denying the fact that he had feelings for her. He didn't know if it was love, but it surely wasn't just lust either. He had grown too attached to her for it to be only lust, and it wasn't just selfish need either. He admired her in so many ways that it was impossible to think of her as just something to salve his wounds with, but he didn't want to put a name to these feelings. They scared him—frightened him more than anything in his entire life. He didn't even know when he started to feel this way toward her. This progressive change in their relationship had been slow enough to slip by unnoticed, even by him and he cursed to himself that he had missed it. If he hadn't been so absorbed in his problems, he might've been able to stop it from getting too far.

Then again, there still was the possibility that he had only gotten used to her presence, so much so that whenever she wasn't around, he began to miss her and nothing more.

He really hoped that was the case.

* * *

"Good morning Kakashi, did you sleep well?"

"Yes, Sakura. No nightmares at all," he lied, hoping she wouldn't catch the small strain in his voice. If she knew what his dream had been about, he'd be dead right now—beyond dead, actually. Luckily, it was Kakashi's lucky day and she didn't notice at all.

"Good! I think we should inform Tsunade-shishou about your improvement…"

"Mm…it's been—what? Eleven days since we've been stuck in here?" Sakura nodded in confirmation. "Well, since we've cooped up so long, how about a walk? The fresh air would do us good," he suggested with a smile.

Sakura nodded. "Fine, but let's have breakfast first, then we'll go."

* * *

"I see. So have you finally faced your past, Kakashi?"

"It's not like that, Tsunade-sama. In fact, I used to face it every morning in front of the memorial stone. It's just that I couldn't tell anyone."

"Really?" she asked, one brow arched skeptically, "and why's that?"

"Personal reasons," he replied cryptically. Tsunade rolled her eyes. Of course.

"But now you are able to speak about it with Sakura?"

Kakashi nodded. "Yes. She's made me look at things in a different perspective. Because of her efforts, I am feeling better."

"Then would you be able to talk about yourself to other people, too?"

Kakashi didn't answer.

"Just Sakura?" Tsunade asked in surprise.

Kakashi merely grunted. Whether he answered coherently or not didn't matter. He knew where she was going with this. Tsunade grinned wickedly.

"You know…the two months aren't finished yet…" she said teasingly, wiggling her brows suggestively. Kakashi inwardly sighed. Sometimes, he wondered how this village survived with Tsunade as their leader.

"Tsunade-shishou!" Sakura burst out indignantly; Kakashi flinched. She was in such a good mood this morning, he thought. Now there would be hell to pay to calm Sakura down.

The blond Hokage just laughed it off.

"Changing the topic, I have news for you. That woman took her own life while in prison. It wasn't from guilt however—there wasn't any note begging for forgiveness—my guess is that she considered her personal mission accomplished. Since her goal was to get revenge, with that finished, she saw no reason to continue living."

She eyed Sakura cautiously. Tsunade was always cautious when using the 'r-word' in front of her pink-haired pupil. Though she knew Sakura was stronger now, reminders of Sasuke had always been painful for the girl to swallow. When Tsunade saw no reactions, however, she went on.

"During interrogation, she admitted she knew we'd captured her. She wasn't so foolish as to believe she could get out of Konoha after what she did. She just needed a bit of time to complete her vengeance: ridiculing Kakashi in front of his friends, colleagues and citizens."

At this point, she looked directly at the Copy Nin. "She didn't want to kill you, Kakashi; she just wanted you to live the rest of your life in the worst, most miserable possible way, which—in my opinion—is far worse than death."

She paused for a moment, trying to decipher his expression, but before she could finish, he was back to his old self, as if the neutral expression on his face had never left. She still had something to say though, since she felt a little responsible for what happened.

"Kakashi, I'm sorry I didn't intervene in the square that day, but Izumo told me you were acting strange so I wanted to study the situation before acting. I had to see it with my own eyes. What if you were poisoned and we didn't have the antidote? What if you were under some unknown kind of genjutsu that only that woman was able to dissolve? You see, I couldn't simply kill her. I needed to understand the circumstances better."

Kakashi nodded with just the barest incline of his head. The apology was unnecessary, however. He never blamed Tsunade for what happened that day, but the thought was touching.

"It's alright, Tsunade-sama. You were correct in your course of action. Rushing into things without knowing exactly what was happening could have caused an irreparable damage on my person. I have to thank you."

Tsunade nodded, then went on.

"Though it doesn't matter now, just so you know, there were five ANBU stationed on the rooftops surrounding the square, ready to kill her if she tried to harm you. However, thanks to Sakura, we were been able to capture her alive."

Tsunade turned towards her pupil. "Sakura, you can stay with Kakashi as long as you think it will be helpful to him. And Kakashi, when you think you're well enough, you may resume your training. After all, we don't want our best shinobi getting rusty, do we? Just take it easy at first or _I'll_ make you."

She glanced at them a last time, then waved her hand, a small smile playing on her lips. "You're dismissed."

They exited the Hokage Tower, Sakura still fuming at Tsunade's previous hints. Kakashi, though previously annoyed at Tsunade's teasing, was now slightly amused seeing his nurse like that. Ok, she wasn't in the mood, but he had missed that side of her nonetheless.

"You know, after all those days of you being sweet and patient with me, I almost forgot about your quick temper…"

"Kakashi, this is so _not_ the time!" she growled. He could tell.

Kakashi shook his head to himself before suggesting, "What about a little sparring session right now? You seem full of energy."

"Fine!"

* * *

**A/N:** it seems we are at a crucial point. What's going to happen now that Kakashi is recovered? Find out in the next chapter: Confessions!

Hehe… I know you can't wait for it! :)

And many many thanks to Moodiful819 for wasting her very firsts days of summer break by editing this chapter. You've been great!


	7. Confrontation

**FACING THE PAST**

**Chapter 7: Confrontation**

* * *

After training, they headed back to Kakashi's apartment for dinner. Sakura had finally calmed down after venting her anger out during her spar with Kakashi, and she was surprised at his level of strength. How he could be back to normal—maybe even _better_—so quickly after what he'd endured these last few days was completely beyond her. Then again, this being Kakashi, she concluded that she shouldn't be so surprised. It was just like him to be impeccably deadly during a fight.

However, all was not like it appeared with our favorite Copy Nin. Despite what Sakura thought, Kakashi's body was actually screaming in pain after sparring with the little pink-haired devil that he had called "student" not so long ago. He would never admit it out loud, but fighting with her in his condition while pretending that it was nothing, had been hell.

"So much for taking it easy," he muttered to himself, irked by the fact that he didn't have as much stamina as he used to. When he was younger, he could've sparred for days at a time, but just two weeks of no training had reduced his stamina to only a few hours. Right now, he simply couldn't wait to flop on the couch.

* * *

"So, Sakura, did you think about what Tsunade said? How long are you going to stay here?" Kakashi asked during dinner. His voice was calm and casual, but deceptively so. In truth, he was afraid to hear what she would say.

"I was thinking of only spending one more night. You need to return to your old life in order to see if you're feeling better. We need to find out if we've really solved your problems, or if it's only because I'm here."

Sakura was talking as his medic, but deep inside she didn't want to leave. In the days they'd spent together, she had begun to harbor feelings for the man, but she didn't know if he had feelings for her as well. She wasn't blind, and she didn't miss his strange reaction two nights ago when she told him to sleep alone, but she didn't know if what he felt for her was romantic, or if it was just a strong attachment from needing her to feel better. It was then that her rational side suggested for some time apart. That way, they could both sort out their feelings (if he had anything to sort out and that it wasn't just her imagination). But despite all rationality that this would be for the best, she couldn't find it in her to leave. She didn't want to be apart from him.

"I see…" His voice was calm and devoid of any emotions. It had to be in order to hide his disappointment from her, and also to hide the annoyance of being disappointed in the first place. Why was this happening?

Sakura closed her eyes and sighed. She had to at least know if he was willing to continue the relationship they had built during these last few days.

"I was wondering…you know…if you'd like to meet sometimes? Just to talk or spar together or something. It'd be a shame to lose our friendship again," she ventured timidly.

At Sakura's timid voice, Kakashi grinned to himself. His little pink-haired devil was now acting like a shy kitten. "You mean having lunch and spending some time together every now and then?"

She nodded vigorously, glad that he had understood her intentions.

"Like a date…?" He just couldn't help teasing her a little.

As expected, she blushed furiously. "Kakashi! I didn't mean anything like that!"

He chuckled lightly and patted her head like he did when she was a kid, earning him a grunt from the still-flustered medic. Chuckling once more at her expense, he cleared his throat, becoming serious, and locked gazes with her.

"I don't want to lose our friendship too, Sakura. I cherish it as much as you do." His smile reassured her about his honesty.

Suddenly a glint flashed in his eye. She caught it and knew he was up to something.

Indeed, it wasn't long before Kakashi was up to his old tricks. In a casual, innocent tone, he gave his suggestion. "We could sleep together tonight, as a sort of goodbye."

She sighed, thinking that sometimes he resembled a very stubborn and spoiled little kid.

"Kakashi, I already told you: you need to learn to sleep without me again!" she scolded him. Lately, she felt so much more at ease with the man that she would let her temper burst freely with him.

"I'll learn it eventually. I wasn't called a genius for nothing." He gave her his patented eye crinkle smile, while instantly his rational side scolded himself. 'So much for regaining some distance, you idiot.' He knew it wasn't a good idea, but he couldn't bear to stay apart from her on their last night together.

This caught her slightly off-guard. "Kakashi…" she groaned, not knowing how to retort. He had a point at that, and she didn't want to be apart that night either. But as his medic, she was obligated to remind him that the sooner he got used to this fact, the better. It was her duty…even if her heart was twisting in knots at the thought of not being in his warmth.

"Sakura, you know I'm right…" he said, arms crossed to his chest in a defiant pose.

"Oh, Kami, you're giving me a headache," she grunted, but eventually gave up. She knew Kakashi would keep this up all night if he had to.

"All right then," she sighed. She hated losing, but deep down, she couldn't really complain at the thought of a last night together. Not that she would ever admit it out loud.

Her reward was a bright smile as he led the way to the bedroom.

* * *

Sakura stared up at the ceiling of Kakashi's room as she sat in his bed. Here they were for their last night together. Both of them were thinking about how much they would miss this tomorrow, and for the second time that evening, Sakura voiced her thoughts. Maybe she was exposing herself a little too much, but she had an ache in her heart and she simply had to tell him. After all, she had already secretly named the silver-haired man as her confidant after the whole Sasuke speech. Who better than him to voice her feelings to?

"It's weird. You were a pain in my side, but I can't help being sad. I think I'll miss this."

"I know. I'll miss it too," he admitted honestly.

She looked him in the eye. "But…but what does this mean? We're friends now, aren't we? But friends don't spoon in bed, so does this mean we aren't friends? What are we, then? I'm confused."

There, she had said it. Even if he was about to call her a fool, she wouldn't mind. She had to know, or else she might have ended up going crazy for sure.

However, despite Sakura's misgivings, Kakashi understood her feelings perfectly because he was thinking the same as well. He was also relieved to find out she had feelings for him too. Now he could tell her his feelings without the fear of losing her. As soon as he realized that, he decided he would be honest with her. He owed Sakura that much at least, but he wouldn't pressure her in any way. Ultimately, it would be her decision to make.

"I don't know, Sakura. You know as well as I do that I'm not an expert with relationships of any kind other than the occasional one-night stand, but I'm pretty sure friends do not sleep together like we have. Then again, people in love do more than what we've done. I guess we're somewhere in between."

He let his sentence drift off as he tried to buy himself time, trying to find the words to ask something he was both excited and afraid to find out. "Sakura…what do you feel towards me?"

He asked the question slowly as if testing out each word carefully. He'd turned to face her as he posed the question, eyes searching her face for a clue to her answer. He was being cautious, but rightly so because he didn't want to be blunt about it, afraid he would somehow influence her. Even if she was older and more mature now, she had looked up to him for years and he knew because of their history, she might only accept his feelings because she didn't want to hurt her former teacher. He knew her penchant for guilt and while he would be hurt if she refused him, he would be hurt more by the knowledge she was lying about her own feelings to save his.

"I'm not sure, Kakashi. I've never been so close to anyone before, so I don't know how to name what I feel."

At her answer, a small twinge of disappointment rose before he quickly stamped it down. What was he expecting? A love declaration? But she had been honest, and he would do the same.

"I feel the same way, but even with our forced close-quarter situation, judging from what I've said before, I guess…we're more than friends?" he asked cautiously, staring at her with a side-long glance, watching her brows knit in concentration. Beneath his calm exterior, he wanted desperately to know what she was thinking. Was she going to agree, or was she going to reject him and say they were indeed just friends? He felt his heart leap into his throat. Unconsciously, the hand at his side gripped the sheets with knuckle-white anxiety before he removed his gaze for fear of her catching the emotions he knew were flying across his eyes. Drawing his feelings back behind his mask, he trained his eyes on the ceiling. From beside him, he could feel Sakura's eyes search his face before following his gaze onto the ceiling as she played with the idea in her mind.

"I guess so," she agreed quietly. Turning to face him, she asked him, "So, how do we figure this out?"

Kakashi glanced at her before returning his gaze to the ceiling. "I think we should just go on as we did before. Tomorrow you'll leave and we'll continue our current relationship as friends with the typical get-togethers: chatting, sparring, eating together while you pick up the tab for me…"

Glancing to the side to check her reaction, he saw the peeved look on her face and gave her his typical, slightly-condescending smile in reply before going back on topic.

"Anyway, we'll probably miss each other first, but that isn't surprising given how closely we've been living for the past few days. However, if we still miss each other and feel like just being friends isn't enough…well, I guess we'd be more than friends then."

"But…what if—what if we find out we're…you know…we're in love with each other?" Sakura asked shyly, flushing with embarrassment. "What will people say about our relationship?" In her voice, he could hear her fear and apprehension.

"Sakura, you know as well as I do that I don't care what people think. I'm already an infamous pervert for enjoying my literature in public, but I understand you being worried about it. However, the fact that people are already talking about us means they're already prepared for what could happen. There are always going to be rumors Sakura, no matter what we do. All we can do is know the truth of the matter and hold our heads up high. Plus, Tsunade bet in our favor, so it seems like she would accept our relationship, so I don't think you have anything to be afraid of."

At Kakashi's reassuring smile, Sakura nodded to herself. He was right, she realized, and mentally chided herself for ever being in doubt. Suddenly, she felt a hand tip her chin up and looking up, she found herself drowning in pools of black and red.

"There's one more thing I want you to remember, Sakura. If it does turn out you fall in love with me, I want you to remember that I'm still fourteen years older than you. When the years pass and you're still young, I'll be an old man. As happy as I would be to have you in love with me, I don't want to tie you down and make you unhappy. Remember this when you sort out your feelings because I don't want you to choose what you think will make me happy. I want you to choose what will make _you_ happy."

His gaze held hers firm, determined she would understand this. If she forsook her happiness for his, he'd never forgive himself. Not only because she chained herself to him out of duty, but because she would have sacrificed her future for him. If it seemed that it would come to that, Kakashi would let her go himself. He wouldn't be happy to do it, but he knew that it would be for the best. If she could never reach her full potential because of him, he would've not only failed as a teacher, but as a friend as well.

Feeling his gaze still on her, she nodded. "Okay Kakashi, I will"

Satisfied with her answer, he nodded and withdrew his hand as he inwardly cursed the loss of her warmth. "It's settled then. Goodnight, Sakura."

"Wait, Kakashi. There's one more thing I wanted to ask you…" Her voice was uncertain; her eyes lowered to avoid his gaze.

"What is it?" he asked, wondering what she was up to.

Sakura looked off to the side as she bit her lower lip nervously. In a small voice, she asked him. "Would you…would you kiss me?"

At her words and the pleading look she gave him, he felt his heart skip a few beats. His mouth went dry and his heart trembled with excitement at the thought about kissing her; his mind verging into more sinful territories.

Pulling back his excitement, Kakashi coughed and cleared his throat. "Wouldn't it be better to wait until we're sure of our own feelings?"

"I know…I know…" she said, "but what if we find out we're just close friends, or if only one of us is in love? I…I want at least one kiss from you, Kakashi. Please. I just…I want to know what it would feel like, for what I feel right now."

Her eyes were lowered in embarrassment, her cheeks glowing warmly. She knew what she was asking for was ridiculous (this would only make things more complicated), but a part of her was selfish and desperate to know what it was like to kiss him. She was so afraid to lose him to being "just friends" when she felt like this towards him. She wanted to remember him as he was with this kiss, indulge in a fantasy of what could be or what could've been. She wanted it so badly, it hurt, and she felt tears dot the corners of her eyes.

He didn't reply but when she felt his fingers skating her jaw, she knew his answer. His hands cupped her cheeks, the warmth of his fingers mingling with the heat of her skin. Moving closer as he tipped her face higher, he slowly leaned towards her until their lips were just touching. Instantly, they closed their eyes, lost in this new sensation. He wanted to keep it soft, to prevent something they'd regret from happening, but her lips pressed more insistently and he felt her body flush against his.

At the sensation, he grunted as he felt the blood rush through his veins. 'So much for taking things slow,' he thought before giving in, tracing her lower lip with his tongue to ask for entrance. She obliged and their tongues met in her mouth, slowly dancing against each other. Though his body was telling him to do more, Kakashi refrained from doing more than kissing her, not wanting to rush things between them and confuse her. Luckily he had regained his usual self-control, or else he would have never been able to restrain himself.

The kiss went on very slowly, Kakashi's thumbs gently caressing her cheeks. To Sakura, it was absolute bliss as she basked in his sweet touches. She was practically melting right then and there, as it was the most romantic moment she'd ever experienced. Even her childhood dreams of the perfect kiss couldn't compare.

Sure, Sakura had kissed a couple of boys before (she was older now, after all), but she had never found the perfect mutual understanding in a kiss on the first try. It would always be three or four kisses in before she would click with them, but this time was different. There was an instant connection, and it sent tingles all over her body that she had never felt before. It probably didn't mean anything (Kakashi was highly reputed in bed. Being a good kisser was probably a given), but she liked to think it did.

Slowly, they parted, panting slightly between them as they struggled to catch their breath. Sakura's half-lidded gaze stared at the sheets as she tried to calm her reeling mind. Chancing a glance, she slowly dragged her gaze up to see Kakashi's reaction, finding him staring at her with an intense, smoldering gaze that made her heart leap into her throat. On his lips, she watched a single word form that made her heart skip a beat.

"Kakashi…?"

Realizing she had been staring, he snapped out of his spell and quickly cleared his throat. "Sorry," he said rather shortly as his hand quickly scrambled to find something to turn off. Reaching the switch of the lamp near his bed, he pulled on the string with a sharp "click."

"Goodnight Sakura."

"Goodnight Kakashi," she returned softly. Nodding once to show her he'd heard, he adjusted himself and closed his eyes.

Sakura stayed awake as she lay in bed, waiting patiently for Kakashi's breathing to even out. As his breath fell into a steady rhythm, Sakura tried to calm her own mind in preparation for sleep. However, no matter how hard she tried, her mind continued to race as she felt her stomach do flips. As much as she tried to convince herself that it was wishful thinking or a trick of the light, Sakura knew what she had seen. Kakashi had whispered the word "beautiful," and what was more, she could swear it was aimed at her.

She felt hope bloom in her chest. Maybe this was a sign, she thought before quickly telling herself to forget it. 'He was probably caught up in the moment. Don't set yourself up for heartbreak again, Sakura. Just be patient.'

But even as she thought that, she couldn't help but hope that maybe…maybe it meant something. Feeling her heart throb heavily in her, she sighed to herself before moving closer to Kakashi to steal some of his warmth.

Tucking herself into the space under his chin, she stole one last look at his face before snuggling closer, ignoring the dull ache in her chest as she did so. Staring into his chest, she listened to the even rhythm of his breathing before being lulled into sleep, nestled beside him.

**

* * *

**

**A/N:** Sorry for those who were expecting some kinky scene during the sparring session. I'm really not good at action things and I don't plan on anything rush between the two, as you've just read.

Ok, so they've laid their cards on the table. I like the sincerity between the two of them. It's something they can afford thanks to the special friendship they've grown into, and I was a little tired of reading in the other stories that Kakashi lies in order to hide his feelings from Sakura and protect her. Well, in truth it is very like him, but at this point of the story, it was likely for him to open up completely to her, so I gladly took the opportunity and changed things for once.

Hope you appreciated it as well.

As for the last part... Moodiful819 had it completely rewritten in order to make it more enthralling. And man, it did work! Thank you, my great beta reader! :)

I'd like to thank all those who have reviewed, especially those who have reviewed every single chapter. I love you all!

See you in the next chapter!


	8. A new life

**FACING THE PAST**

**Chapter 8: A new life**

* * *

Sakura left the next morning after having breakfast. Heading to the hospital, she felt all the villagers' eyes on her, much to her dismay.

'How am I supposed to react to this?' she wondered.

While the rosette usually would have simply ignored her offenders, ignoring an entire village of people was another thing entirely. She contemplated just punching them into a wall like she did Naruto or Sai when they bothered her, but she knew she could never hurt them. It was only because she was close to Sai and Naruto that she allowed herself to hit them; she knew her boundaries with them. The village was something else entirely.

Also, she didn't want to deal with healing them all. Sometimes being one of the best medics in Konoha was a problem.

And so, she did the only thing she could do: she sprinted to the hospital, pretending not to be aware of what was happening.

The nurses and medics were just a little bit more subtle than the common villagers; they knew very well, after all, what an angry Sakura was capable of. But she felt all the eyes on her nonetheless.

'Damn, this is going to be a rough week!' she thought, hoping against hope that a week would be enough for things to come back to normal.

She went through her shift avoiding human contact as much as possible before she left her shift at noon. Kakashi was there, lazily leaning on the hospital wall, waiting for her. She immediately blushed, irritably aware of the people's stares directed to the two of them.

"Yo." He greeted her with his eye-crinkled smile.

"Hello, Kakashi-senpai." Her eyes caught his visible one just for a moment, then darted on the floor. 'How is it possible?' she wondered, 'He doesn't seem affected at all from their behavior.'

"Ready for lunch?"

"Sure, senpai."

After eating, they went to their old training ground to spar together for a couple of hours. Exhausted, they sat on the grass under a large tree in order to catch their breath, their bodies close enough to feel the heat radiating from the other's body but not enough to touch.

"What's the matter, Sakura? You seem lost in thought." Kakashi asked in a concerned tone after a while.

She didn't reply immediately, not knowing how to explain her thoughts. Eventually she spoke.

"Kakashi, how can you be so collected in front of all these people? Don't you see the way they stare at us? It's been like this ever since this morning, you know." She locked her eyes with his one, an exasperated expression written on her face.

"Sakura, I didn't know you were so impressionable," he chuckled, earning a glare from his companion.

"They're just curious about us," he added with his hands raised in a placating manner, "This village isn't immune to gossip and they're just trying to find something that will confirm their suspicions. Once they find out what's going on between us, they'll stop staring."

"Do you really think it's that easy?" Sakura wasn't content with that simple explanation. The situation felt too out of control to be that simple.

"Sure. Most people have nothing interesting to do, so this gossip around us is like honey to the bees. We're their new pastime at the moment, but eventually they'll grow tired of it. If you don't want to give them more fun than what they're already having, you can't show them how much you're affected by all this. Trust me."

"I doubt it's that simple," Sakura said with a skeptical frown.

"Suit yourself. But if you do want to listen to my sage advice, I always have a spare mask for you to borrow." His eye sparkled with humor, but she didn't appreciate the fact she seemed to be the butt of his joke and Kakashi narrowly dodged the chakra-laced punch aimed at his face.

Realizing Sakura hadn't found him funny at all, he knew it was time to get serious or he would be in trouble. He moved himself in a sitting position in front of Sakura and gave her all his attention.

"Well, there could be another way…but I don't know if you can do it…" He eyed his nurse with an inquiring look.

"What's that?"

"We should play their game. Part of their fun is that you're scared of them. If we act as if we are a couple—openly—like we're not afraid of what they think about us at all—we'll ruin their fun and they'll eventually lose interest."

Sakura's eyes opened wide in shock, but after a moment of consideration she asked, "But wouldn't the rumors be worse than they are now?"

The Copy Nin relaxed himself once more, returning his back to the grass and crossing both his arms under his head.

"That's why I didn't want to suggest the idea. Besides, we agreed to be simply friends for now, and acting like that is not the right way to go. But remember, if we do find out that we are in love with each other, we'll have to face things like this eventually." Turning to her, he smiled. "Just think of it as practice, ne?" he reassured.

Sakura smiled at his attempt to raise her spirits and felt her fears begin to calm. "I know, but in that case, all the troubles we would have to go through wouldn't be just to get rid of the rumors. I think the reward would give me new strength."

"And what would the reward be?" Kakashi asked, curiosity in his tone.

"Being with the man I love." She smiled sweetly for the first time that day, and he couldn't help but return it, even if it stayed hidden under his mask.

They spent the rest of the afternoon sitting there and chatting a little, then Kakashi opened his infamous book and Sakura felt asleep. Eventually they parted, the silver haired jounin to catch up with his old friends, and the medic to visit her parents.

Sakura was sure the rumors had reached their ears too, so she owed them the truth.

She found them both at home, and their expressions were indeed a bit worried.

"So Sakura, how was your last mission? Is Hatake-san fine now?" her mom ventured while preparing a cup of tea.

"Yes he is, mom."

An awkward silence followed, neither knowing what to say next. Sakura eventually decided that she owed her parents an explanation and began reassuring them.

"You know, it's not like people say. Nothing happened while I was there; he was always respectful towards me."

"So you're not a couple?" Her father was sighing in relief.

"Well, we are very close friends…" Sakura blushed so much that her mother noticed it immediately.

"How close is 'close,' Sakura?" Mrs. Haruno enquired.

"Well…" Sakura trailed off. She didn't know how to explain their relationship. In fact, she didn't know quite how to describe it herself. "I…I like him very much, mom; and I know for sure that he likes me as well. But we're not in a romantic relationship."

Her father's brows furrowed, but her mother put her hand on his arm, silently telling him to let their daughter speak freely and not put her on the defense.

"So you decided to remain just friends?"

"We've decided to stay friends until we sort out our feelings."

Her mother arched an eyebrow. "What do you mean by that? Didn't you just tell me you both like each other? Explain it a bit better."

Sakura sighed. She knew she would have to tell them everything that had happened during the last few days, but she had hoped she wouldn't have to do it so soon. Some of the details were slightly embarrassing.

"It's better if I tell you everything from the beginning." She sipped her tea, and waited for her mother to take her place on the coach next to her father.

"You remember the incident from a few days ago where that woman entered the village? Well, it turned out that Kakashi had been psychologically tortured by that woman as part of a revenge plot. Because of this, every time he fell asleep, he'd have terrible nightmares and I ended up sleeping with him so that he would be able to sleep well."

"YOU DID WHAT?" Sakura's father burst out, and once again his wife stopped him.

"Did anything happened, Sakura?" Her eyes were scanning Sakura's face searching for an answer.

"No! He didn't try anything on me. We just slept in the same bed. Oh, mom, you should have seen him! He was screaming. He was terrified of falling asleep. He even cried! I didn't know what to do, mom! I didn't know what else to do!"

Mrs. Haruno was stunned speechless. She didn't know Hatake Kakashi personally, but his reputation (ignoring his perverse streak) was that of a cool and deadly weapon. Until that moment, she had never even thought of him as a man.

"I…I can't believe it!"

"I didn't believe it either, but he was in front of my eyes, crying! Seeing him like that almost broke me. He was my teacher—the man that first taught me how to be a ninja—and he had always protected me with his life. I had always looked up to him, and to see him like that…I didn't know what to do. It hurt that I couldn't help get rid of the nightmares or turn back time so it had never happened, so I did the only thing I could think of. I climbed into his bed and tried to calm him down as best I could. I owe him so much, mom. I had to do something—offering my presence to help him calm himself was the only thing I could think of—but I swear he never tried anything on me!"

Sakura's mother relaxed a bit. "It's all right, Sakura; we trust you." Even if Mr. Haruno didn't speak, he seemed a bit relieved too. They both knew their daughter wasn't a liar, and she was old enough to fight them if she wanted. If she said nothing happened, it had to be true.

"During the day, Kakashi was almost normal. The problems would only occur when night fell. We spoke a lot in those days and we got to know each other very well. Eventually, we became close friends, and I began to see him not just as my ex-teacher but as a man, and I could say the same about him.

"Finally, he told me about his past and it was so painful that I cried… I am the first person whom he talked about it with, you know? For the first time in years, he didn't have to bear that burden all alone, and that helped him a lot. That night, we didn't sleep together and he didn't have any nightmares.

"We knew my work was finished, but just the thought of returning to our old lives led us to think about what we had. We spoke about it and I told him I would miss him, even if I didn't know how to describe my feelings, and he said it was the same for him. He told me there was the possibility that we were so used to living together that we could have missed each other out of habit, so for now he said we'd be close friends; we'd spend more time together and we'd see if it would be enough or not. He said it was important to sort out our feelings before making any decisions. He's also concerned about our age gap; I think he is afraid to ruin my life so he wants to make sure I'm absolutely sure about my feelings before doing anything. That's all."

Mr. and Mrs. Haruno didn't speak for a while. Sakura left them to their thoughts, knowing they needed a bit of time to digest and think over what she said.

Once again, her mother was the one to speak, Mr. Haruno not being very good at these kinds of things.

"When did you talk about this, Sakura?" she ventured.

"Yesterday."

"And what do you think of him right now?"

Sakura blushed again and her eyes darted to the floor. "I think I love him." Her mother sighed, while her father was too shocked to say or do anything.

"I think he's right, Sakura. It could just be that you got used to living with him and you're missing him only for that reason. Please, don't make any hasty decisions. I know you're an adult now, and I know you'll make the right choice, but if you need some advice, we'll be here."

"I know, mom. Thank you."

"I also see that Hatake-san deeply cares for you. He could have easily tried to seduce you, but he was respectful towards you, giving you time to decide and bringing your attention to the difficulties you'd have in that type of relationship like your age difference." A sigh left her mother's lips before she looked up at her daughter with a wistful, almost exasperated look. "If you choose to stay with him, I guess I'll just have to learn to accept it. If he makes you happy, who am I to judge?"

Sakura smiled at her mother, then turned to her father, her eyes full of apprehension. He had his eyes closed, as if in deep thought, then slowly opened them and looked at her.

"Sakura, it's hard for me to think about you with a man. I already knew he was an elite shinobi, and now I've learned that he was a complete gentleman during your stay and cares deeply for you. Since you've been the Hokage's apprentice for a while now after being his student, it'd be ridiculous to think you're still under his influence, but I cannot say I'm not worried about his age. Nonetheless, I trust you and if you'll decide that he is worthy of you, I'll accept him as well."

Sakura smiled brightly and hugged the both of them. It had been easier than she thought, and now she was relieved. For the next few days, she knew she would be able to withstand the gossip with more confidence.

Neither Kakashi nor Sakura could sleep that night, but that was expected. Eventually they'd get used to sleeping alone again, and they both knew it. However, it didn't mean they were fine with that prospect.

* * *

The following days went on in the same way: every morning Sakura would go to work and finish her shift at the hospital. After her shift, she would find Kakashi waiting for her so they could have lunch together. After that, they would train together and then rest under the trees in each other's company before parting for their separate ways.

As Sakura sat in the shade of a tree on one such day, she smiled. She always enjoyed spending this time with him. When Sakura was with Kakashi, she could easily forget all the rumors around them. His presence was a comfort and it always made her feel more confident afterwards.

And true to Kakashi's word, after a few weeks, the gossip had faded as the village grew tired of waiting for something that seemed like it was never going to happen.

They both enjoyed this routine of theirs—much more now that they could enjoy it without scruple—but despite that, the happiness they felt always seemed a bit hollow. Neither could shake the feeling that something was missing.

As they lay under the trees, both of them felt the need to become closer. Their shoulders could touch, their backs could rest upon the each other's, but it was never enough. Kakashi wanted to pass his hands through her hair, to hold her like he used to when they slept together, and…well…let's just say Icha Icha was maybe not the best choice of reading material when he was so close to her.

Sakura, for her part, wanted more or less the same things. Maybe her thoughts were less graphic (after all, she wasn't very experienced in that department and she didn't read those oh-so-inspiring books), but her feelings of longing were just the same. To feel his hands, his lips on her would be bliss.

As a result, every time they brushed against each other—as Kakashi turned the pages of his book, as Sakura stretched after her little nap—the tension would grow. It was unbearable to be so close, yet denied so easily. It was irritating, infuriating and many times, they wishes they could just give up pretense and hold and kiss each other senseless.

Was it really due to just habit, they wondered day after day. Sure, they were used to sleeping next to each together, but they kissed only once—hardly a habit.

They were physically attracted; that much was certain, and neither would deny that fact. However, that wasn't good enough for either of them. Lust was easy to solve—a fling, a one-night stand, "friends with benefits"—but was that the cause for all their pains? Was it as simple as just lust when they longed for each other so forcefully? Their need transcended just physical attraction and shallow affections, but was that enough to call it love?

That's where they would always stop, time and time again. They had never experienced love before, so how could they recognize it?

A part of them kept saying there was no way to recognize true love—that it wasn't like you could find someone with a sign saying "I'm the love of your life" on their back—that you had to just follow your instinct and your heart and see what would happen—but it was that thought—that blind trust in midst of freefall—that scared them.

Sakura still carried the painful memories of her old unrequited crush while Kakashi was still mourning the loved ones he lost so many years ago. He was afraid to suffer again. To lose Sakura now would be crushing, but to lose her as a lover would be unbearable.

Neither of them wanted to voice their thoughts, and so they continued as they were, touching without touching. After all, they still had each other in some way, and even if maybe this wasn't really enough, it was safer.

* * *

Kakashi's and Sakura's friends dealt with this new relationship with discretion from the start. They knew better than to mess with the Copy Nin or the even more threatening hot-tempered kunoichi of the Leaf village. Only Ino and Genma, their cheekiest friends, dared to ask them about it (subtly, of course. They were daring, not stupid), but neither received any answer. Naruto, on his part, remained surprisingly quiet.

This didn't mean, however, that they didn't observe them. Being their friends, they were just as concerned about the couple as they were curious, so they immediately saw when Kakashi and Sakura were in a stalling position. After enough time had passed, Tsunade decided it was time to intervene. It was for their sake, she said (mostly to herself). The timing of this intervention probably had something to do with the approaching deadline of the bet but no one was foolish enough to point it out and there were no objections when Tsunade sent Kakashi on a mission.

She called him in early in the morning, while Sakura was in the hospital. It was a seven-day B-class mission, and Genma would be his backup to ensure everything went alright. It was his first mission after his incident and Tsunade made sure every precaution was taken.

She gave them all the details, saying they should go as soon as possible, and then dismissed the two jounin.

Before leaving, Kakashi told Genma to be ready at the gates in two hours.

"I told you to go as soon as possible, Kakashi. One hour is plenty enough for you two to get ready," Tsunade told him with mild annoyance in her tone.

Kakashi merely smiled it off. If she didn't need him alive for her bet, she would've punched the smile off his face. Cocky bastard. "We'll make up for the lost time, Tsunade-sama. No need to worry."

Tsunade kept the irritation on her face, but as soon as he turned to leave, the Fifth glanced at Genma and they sent each other a knowing grin.

Kakashi went home to pack his things, then headed to the hospital where he knew Sakura was almost done with her shift. He wanted to see her before leaving, not because he was afraid of the mission—It was, in fact, quite simple and he knew he would surely come back—but just because he knew he would miss her.

Meeting her at their usual spot, he quickly told her about his mission and reassured her before leaving, exactly two hours after his briefing with Tsunade.

The Hokage watched the scene from a hospital window, a knowing smile on her face.

'Ahh, I should have bet on him to wait to tell her goodbye…' she thought regretfully before turning away to reach Shizune at work.

With the previous chapter I hoped to hit 100 reviews but no... I only get 5 reviews! Sob, sob... :°(

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**A/N: **With the previous chapter I hoped to hit 100 reviews but no... I only get 5 reviews! Sob, sob... :°(

Well, crying won't help me to hit my goal, so I've tried my best to be worth of your reviews, even if this is just a transition chapter.

Thanks a lot to moodiful819 for her efforts in betaing my poor writing, thanks to all people who keep reading my story and please, don't make me cry again... write lots of reviews! :)


	9. I missed you!

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**FACING THE PAST**

**Chapter 9: I missed you!**

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**A/N:** Warning! Lemon at the end of the chapter! I tried to keep it as clean as possible, but it is still very graphic and…well, sex is sex, if you know what I mean…

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The seven days spent on the mission passed by agonizingly slow for both Kakashi and Sakura. Sakura missed Kakashi dearly; and while the mission provided some distraction, Kakashi still missed his nurse very much.

On the last day of the mission, Kakashi decided that once he got home, he would talk to her. After all the denial they'd gone through during these past few weeks, this separation forced him to face his own feelings. If he had been unsure about his feelings before, this mission made it clear to him he was in love with his pink-haired friend and he couldn't wait a minute more to hold and kiss her senseless.

For her own part, Sakura had decided the same thing. This ache in her heart could be nothing else than love. A part of her was afraid of him not loving her back, but she easily shook away those concerns. Even if that was the case, it was time for her to confront Kakashi and confess her feelings and hope it would go well.

Kakashi arrived in Konoha late in the evening. He had decided earlier that day that he would sleep embracing Sakura that very night, no matter what. Well, her feelings permitting, but he was quite confident about her feelings, and besides it was time to make a decision. Though the shivers and hopeful anticipation he felt whenever she was around were pleasant in their own way, he was tired of always being on-edge. It was time to take a step forward, hopefully together. They had had enough time to think about their situation, and it was now time to decide if they wanted to follow their hearts or not. Kakashi could see they were just stalling; this situation couldn't lead anywhere while they were so set on keeping things safe between them, but he didn't want to play it safe anymore. It was now or never for him. Hopefully, the break the mission gave them had led Sakura to the same conclusions he'd made.

His mind made up, he went home to take a quick shower. Though he had planned to go to Sakura's directly after arriving back in the village, he'd managed to get quite dirty on the way home and didn't think Sakura would appreciate him dripping mud on her floor.

As soon as he left the bathroom, he heard someone knocking on his door and immediately recognized Sakura's chakra signature.

Grinning inwardly—looks like he wasn't the only one who couldn't wait until tomorrow to see the other—he put on the first pair of pants he could find and went to greet his visitor.

Sakura stood on Kakashi's doorstep, eyes wide as she stared at the reason for why she had come. Though her face had become pinker than usual from waiting in the evening cold, she had flushed bright red upon coming face to face with Kakashi. Before coming, she had rehearsed her confession to Kakashi multiple times in her head. She would tell him she couldn't stand being away from him any longer and that she wanted a relationship with him, but once her eyes locked onto his bare chest, all thoughts flew from her mind. During her stay in his house, the most she had seen was the lower half of his face. Now he was _shirtless _on his doorstep with his bangs falling freely over his sharingan eye while a few drops of water rolled over his chest and his abs, making him glistening in the dim light. Judging from his damp hair and wet skin, he must have just come from the shower; and she couldn't help but notice that his pants were sitting awfully low on his waist…

'EYES UP! HE'S TALKING TO YOU!' a voice in her head shouted.

"Sakura, as comfortable as my doorstep may be, would you like to come inside?" His grin danced on his unmasked lips mirthfully. Sending a scathing glare at him, she quickly stepped inside.

Kakashi chuckled as Sakura passed him in the doorway. Smiling and shaking his head to himself as he closed the door, he turned to ask her why she was here when he suddenly felt himself in Sakura's tight embrace, her face buried in his chest.

"I missed you, Kakashi," she whispered.

"I missed you too Sakura," he said as he let himself return the embrace, "but it really was a simple mission; nothing to be afraid of."

"I know I had nothing to be afraid of. I just…I missed you. I missed you even before this mission. I missed you even when we saw each other every day. It wasn't enough. It _isn't_ enough. I want more from this. I want…I want…I guess what I'm trying to say is that I…I love you, Kakashi," she said at last feeling flustered as her face burned with embarrassment.

At her words, Kakashi's heart leapt in his chest. Those words were what he thought he'd never hear from her. Now that he did, he felt dizzy with joy. Sakura liked him—loved _him!_ Him!

However, as much as he wanted to celebrate, he had to know that she had thought this through. "Sakura, I feel the same way," he began as he rubbed his neck in agitation, careful to keep his hands to himself despite how much he wanted to hold her. As he stood there under Sakura's stunned gaze, he wished more than ever that he had his mask on before daring to meet her gaze. "But before we move forward, I need to know that you've thought out everything. No matter how we dress this up, I still am 14 years your senior. Are you sure you want to do this? To throw away your life to be with me?"

He watched as Sakura's eyes widened in shock. In the back of his mind, he braced himself for her to pull away and leave his home—and him—forever. Kakashi had been so convinced of that scenario that he was utterly flabbergasted when he felt Sakura pull his hands down and held them in her own.

"Kakashi, I don't view us getting together as 'throwing my life away.' Regardless of age, regardless of your quirky habits, it's you that I love. And if we get together, I get to be with the man I love—aren't I adding to my life instead?" she asked gently.

A small glowing sensation warmed his heart, but he just couldn't be sure. "Do you really want this? I mean, what if you change your mind about me when I'm older and different? Age doesn't affect just the body, you know."

Sakura laughed as if the idea of her changing her mind was absurd. "Kakashi, you know how stubborn I am. I doubt after working this hard that I'll just change my mind," she said with a smile, "Besides, if we grow old together, we'll change together."

"But—"

"Kakashi," she told him firmly as she looked up into his eyes. She knew he loved her, but he was so afraid of her feelings. What could she say to convince him she would always be there for him?

"Kakashi…I know nothing is ever certain in love. We might fight, we might mess up—I don't know if this will last forever—but I'm willing to give it a try because I'm sure about my feelings for you. I love you. How many times do I have to say it before I can convince you?"

Kakashi stared at Sakura in stunned amazement before letting a small smile settle on his lips. She was right, they would never know for sure, but trying and failing was better than giving up in the first place. In his search for her being sure of her feelings, it seemed that he lost sight of his original purpose. Sakura had shown wisdom beyond her years and Kakashi sighed wistfully to himself. Somewhere, without him looking, Sakura had grown up.

Smiling, Kakashi squeezed her hands reassuringly. "I'm sorry. I've waited for this for so long…I just had to be sure."

Sakura nodded in understanding. "Just have a little more faith in me Kakashi, okay?"

"Deal," he said with a smile.

Their feelings now revealed, Kakashi and Sakura basked in the comfort they felt of knowing that they loved each other. Hesitantly, Kakashi let his hands trail up her arms before settling them on her hips as she let her hands settle on his shoulders. Eyes locked, they smiled at each other, flushing slightly in nervous embarrassment before closing the distance between them to settle in a gentle embrace.

"You have no idea how long I've waited to do this again," Kakashi said after a moment of silence, "Before you came here, I had planned to go over to your place after my shower to tell you how I felt. I was going to go right after I got back, but I was covered in mud."

At his confession, Sakura giggled into her hand before smiling up at him. It was a smile he'd never seen on Sakura's face, full of happiness and love. Smiling back, Kakashi let his forehead drop against hers and thanked Kami that he was able to enjoy this kind of happiness, savoring the moment before looking at the woman who had stolen his heart. Sakura looked up with equal adoration in her eyes, and soon, lost in each other's eyes, they moved towards each other to kiss.

It had started as a brief kiss. He'd only meant to brush against her lips, but once he did, he found he couldn't tear himself away from the delicious electricity that sparked between them. Inside his mind, he fought for control and he'd almost won, had Sakura not moaned when she did.

Sakura pulled away from the kiss, breathless. Never before had she kissed or been kissed like that. It felt like a dream and she would've gladly melted in Kakashi's arms when she suddenly felt herself lifted into the air. Scrambling for a hold, she held onto Kakashi for dear life as he led them to the bedroom. Laying her in the bed, she watched as he climbed in beside her.

"Kakashi, what—"

Whatever she was going to say died on her lips as Kakashi claimed her mouth in a kiss.

"I love you," Kakashi said, pulling away and pressing their foreheads together as they lay in his bed. His voice was slightly breathless, but determined. In his eyes, Sakura watched the flickers of guilt and fear flash through his gaze. The realization that he was still afraid flashed through her mind and she wanted to soothe it away; to prove he had nothing to fear anymore.

Reaching up to cup the side of his face, she gently brushed her lips against his before pressing them against his mouth more fully. The warmth of his skin and the gentle fan of his breathe mingled with the sensation of their bodies flush against each other and their touching lips, and a sense of completion enveloped the two.

What had started as a gentle kiss soon escalated into more as their lips nipped more insistently, pressing, pulling, licking. He rolled her under him, sliding his tongue alongside hers, sucking. Their hands roved over each other, unable to get enough of the sensation of skin under their fingertips. More, a voice in his head demanded, more. He needed more and instinct guided him as he let a hand skim her side, her neck. She moaned in response, and the sound froze him as he realized what they were doing.

"Sakura," he gasped as he pulled away, "there's no need to rush things between us. If you want to stop now, just tell me." However, if she asked him to stop, he didn't know if he really could. The temptation of her skin, his desire for her was overwhelming, but if she asked, he'd stop. He'd force himself to.

Sakura nodded in understanding, but even with the warning, she didn't think she would have ever stopped him. All the tension in the past few weeks was finally about to be released by the man she loved. She didn't see any reason to stop him—she was a woman. She had her needs too—and if Kakashi took any longer, Sakura had half a mind to tell him to just shut up and kiss her.

Luckily, Sakura didn't need to worry about such things as Kakashi soon resumed what he'd started. He moved over her, keeping most of his weight on his left elbow, and kissed her as his right hand buried itself in her hair. He loved the silken texture of her hair between his fingertips and closing his eyes, he focused on her lovely scent.

Her arms instantly went around his neck and she began to lightly trace over his shoulder blades with her fingertips. Being a medic, she already gave him massages in a few occasions, but in this whole new context, the same simple gesture gave her an amazing sensation. She reveled in the feeling of his muscles tensing under her hands. It was like she could feel his strength, and she let her hands roam over his back. For a brief moment, she wondered if she would still be able to give him a massage in the future without feeling excited, but the thought soon faded as she lost herself in his touches.

Leaving her lips, he began to slowly lower his head, kissing and nipping her jaw, her chin, her neck. She shuddered against him.

"Sensitive, aren't we?" he asked, his voice muffled by her neck's now-hot skin. Her mind barely registered what he said, but even if she had, she didn't think she could form an answer, too lost in the sensations she was feeling.

Seeing her so responsive to his touch, Kakashi began to lift her shirt over her abdomen. Sakura immediately obliged, arching her body to help him to completely remove it. Her back arched; her hips ground against his arousal, and a tingle began to build up in the pit of her stomach.

Left in her bra with only a dim light in the room, Kakashi focused his gaze to the darkness, letting his gaze rove over her body. Instantly, he felt the need to devour her creamy skin. He kissed her cleavage as his free hand moved to her back to undo her bra.

Fingers paused over the clasp, he stopped to carefully gauge her reaction. He searched for any sign of discomfort, but there was nothing like that. Her eyes were glazed with passion and lit with the unmistakable glow of _lust_.

His little cherry blossom… Just a few weeks before, he would have never thought of seeing her this way, all hot and needy with him as the reason of her arousal. He thought she'd never looked more beautiful.

"Kakashi…" she whined impatiently, snapping him from his thoughts. Removing her bra, he kissed her lips again, letting his right hand massage her left breast. She flinched at the touch, but soon lost herself in his kiss and relaxed. An intense pleasure was beginning to build up inside her and she found out she wanted more.

Seeing her at ease with his touch, he parted from her lips, trailing kisses down her chin, her neck, her chest before stopping at her nipple. Letting his tongue peek from his lips, he licked it and when he heard her responsive moan, let his lips wrap around the bud to suck. She gasped, moving her hands from his shoulders to his head, pressing it further into her breast. Smirking at her eagerness, he went on with his agonizing slow pace.

He moved to the other nipple, and with his free hand, began to move down her abdomen, stopping to the hem of her pants.

By this point, Sakura was panting slightly and began to tug at his hair in an attempt to urge him to go on since he seemed to be lazily taking his time with every single touch. She was now feeling an ache in her nether regions, so she arched her back to urge him in removing her pants, and he obliged once again.

He began to massage her belly and went lower, over her panties. She gasped at first, but the pleasure was so intense that she didn't want him to stop, instead grinding against his hand. He slipped a finger under her panties, toward her center.

"Kakashi…" Her voice was filled with desire; she wanted him in all possible ways.

He slipped his finger inside her and she gasped, digging her nails into his skin. Oh, how he loved to see her like this. Her panting was driving him crazy. He didn't know if he would be able to stop. His skin felt hot. The need to be inside of her raged within him. He needed her more than anything—more than air—he could only hope she didn't ask for him to stop

He added another finger, stretching her passage. In response, she bit his neck.

"Kakashi, please…" She was incapable of thought; she only felt that ache she wanted to get rid of. Possessed by her desire, she tugged on his pants, removing them along with his boxers and her panties.

He took his time to look at her creamy body, drinking in her beauty.

"Have I ever told you how beautiful you are?" he whispered in her ear. She giggled a little at the comment as her emerald eyes roamed over his body. Those same eyes widened when she saw his manhood and she quickly averted her gaze, unaware of his smug grin.

He knew she was ready, but he also knew from many years of one-night stands that any "first-time pain" would ruin the moment. Some girls were lucky enough to not feel much discomfort, while others felt it so much that their first time was utterly unpleasant. Worst of all, there was no way to know what category Sakura fell under when all Kakashi wanted was to make her first time blissful.

Realizing this, he'd decided to tease her to her limit so he could minimize the pain she felt during sex. It wasn't guaranteed to work, but he could at least give it a try.

Positioning himself between her legs, he began to slowly rub himself against her center, letting her feel his hardness.

"Kakashi… stop… teasing…" Her voice was strangled by her heavy pants.

Seeing that she was losing her mind, he entered her with just his tip. She moaned and ground against him and he began to slowly grind himself inside her, but she wanted all of him.

"_Kakashi…"_ she pleaded.

So he went ahead a little more, but he didn't reach her barrier, and kept on moving in little circles like that.

"Kakashi, I told you stop teasing me!" she said impatiently. She was at wit's end and if he didn't hurry up, Sakura would take things into her own hands.

He grinned once again at her impatience and finally entered inside her fully. She winced a bit when he tore through her barrier, but the feeling of having finally him full inside of her was worth the pain. Besides, the pain was definitely bearable; she was a kunoichi, after all.

"Don't stop…" Her eyes were closed, and Kakashi marveled at her as her skin glistened in the dim light and thanked Kami that she had been ready when she had been. He didn't think he'd have been able to restrain himself any longer.

He began with a slow pace, increasing it little by little to be sure she was fine with it. After a while, she felt something in her belly on the verge of exploding. Afraid of what it was, Sakura tried to hold it back.

"Just let go, Sakura. It's the best part. Trust me," he groaned, giving her a reassuring kiss as he increased his speed. He was close to climax, but he wanted her to come first. Sensing she was close too, he began to thrust as quick and deep as possible, his pace becoming frenzied. A moment later, she was crying out his name and feeling her walls clench onto him, he felt himself give into release.

They both collapsed on the bed, trying to catch their breath. Pulling out of her, he laid on his back with her half-sprawled on top of him.

"Wow…" she whispered between them. She couldn't believe an orgasm could make her lose her mind like that. The pleasure slowly fading, she smiled at the warmth spreading through her, leaving her in a blissful state.

He smirked at her comment and had just a moment to whisper "I love you" before falling asleep, too tired from the mission and the love-making they just had. She smiled hearing that and covered them with the sheets before falling asleep as well.

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**A/N:** Many many many thanks to you all! I've hit 100 reviews on the very first day I put the 8th chapter online! I felt all giddy… I love you!

So-o-o… they're finally together! But how will Konoha react to this? You'll find out in the last chapter: Announcements.

Stay tuned and keep reviewing, please! I'm addicted to your comments, I couldn't live without them!


	10. Announcements

FACING THE PAST

**Chapter 10: Announcements**

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"Good morning, sweetie," was the first thing Sakura heard the moment she woke up, uttered by the smooth voice of none other than the Copy Nin. She found she liked being called "sweetie." Had Kakashi used "love" or even "dear", she would have probably laughed (it didn't fit his image at all), but "sweetie" fit perfectly. It was sweet without being too cheesy.

A small smile played on Sakura's pink lips as she basked in the warm sensation of waking up in the arms of the man she loved. As she lay there in his embrace, it struck her how strange it was. After all, who would have ever thought that one day she would become Kakashi's lover?

"Good morning Kakashi," she finally chirped. Even if she didn't use any lovey-dovey appellative, her tone of voice was so sweet that it melted the usually-stoic silver-haired jounin on the spot.

They took their time in bed, enjoying each other's company after sleeping alone for so many nights, kissing and joking and laughing as if it was the most natural thing to them, both of them remembering the last night's blissful love-making.

When they woke up to have breakfast, Kakashi's behavior seemed a little strange, but Sakura didn't say anything and waited for him to bring up the subject plaguing his mind.

Kakashi coughed loudly. "Sakura…I was thinking, since we're dating now and everything…maybe I should meet your parents?" Uneasiness was written all over his face. The last time he met Sakura's parents was during a parent-teacher conference back when Sakura was still a genin. Now, he was going to introduce himself as their daughter's love interest, and while that in itself was very nerve-wracking, to make things worse, Kakashi was not very well-versed in these types of matters (dating seemed like a waste of time when he had only been interested in one thing).

Sakura gave a short laugh, amused by Kakashi's obviously-flustered manner. "Well, I do want to tell them we're together, and they'll definitely want to meet you."

His usually-aloof attitude, having already been seriously compromised, shattered completely upon hearing her say that. An audible gulp escaped Kakashi's side, but Sakura continued on, having missed it.

"Besides, I have already explained to them our situation when I left your house, so they are probably already half-expecting this. But I guess it would be ok if we go together."

He nodded, then suddenly gave a heavy sigh. "And we can't forget about Tsunade. She has to know. Honestly, I don't know which meeting scares me more," he said, tiredly passing a hand over his face.

Sakura laughed again before abruptly stopping as a thought hit her. "Kakashi, are the two months of the bet already over?"

He thought about it for a while before telling her there was still a week.

She sighed with a half-smile gracing her lips. "At least Tsunade-shishou will take the news well."

Kakashi merely shook his head alongside her.

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Two hours later, they were knocking on the door of Sakura's parents.

When Mrs. Haruno opened the door and saw Kakashi with her daughter, she immediately knew what was coming.

She led the two in the living room where they sat on the couch while she called her husband to join them, taking their seats on the opposite couch.

"Um…mom, do you remember my last visit?" Sakura was slightly nervous, but she was sure that her parents would accept Kakashi. Even if they didn't now, she wouldn't leave him. She would just keep at it until they eventually did.

"Yes dear," was the calm response of her mother.

"Well, this is Kakashi," she introduced; he bowed deeply in his seat, his face a stone mask of decorum and propriety.

"We already had a clue about that…" Mrs. Haruno smirked, deciding it was better to lighten a little the mood. Kakashi, sensing this, smiled at her gratefully, feeling immediately better.

"So-o-o…we sorted out our feelings…and..."

Sakura was fidgeting now, her eyes glued to her lap. Even if she was confident in their understanding, it didn't change how difficult this was. However, she had to do this, and after a moment, she took a deep breath and raised her eyes to her parents' inquiring gazes. "Mom. Dad; we're in love and we want to be together."

Mr. Haruno, who had intentionally avoided speaking until then in order to hide his nervousness, opened his mouth—but his wife cut him off.

"We were expecting this," her mother said calmly. "Are you sure, dear?"

"Absolutely, mom," Sakura said resolutely.

Sakura's mother then turned to Kakashi. "Sakura told us what happened in your home. We completely trust her and we appreciate that you didn't take advantage of her. However, we'd like to hear from you what exactly your feelings and intentions are toward her. After all, you were her former sensei—even if for only one year—and you sometimes went on missions with her. We thought you'd see her in a fatherly way rather than as a woman. What changed your mind?"

Kakashi knew they had a point. Up until a few weeks before, he'd only thought of Sakura in what indeed had seemed like a paternal fashion. However things changed, and he was unable to prevent that. Now he knew he owed them an explanation.

"As you know, I've known Sakura for eight years and in that time, I've cared for her like any adult cares for a child in their care. Even as she matured mission after mission, my feelings for her were only that of camaraderie and nothing more. My feelings were and remained platonic, even when she left for tutelage under Tsunade. It was only during these past few weeks that I started seeing her in a different way. Our close proximity allowed me to know her in a way I didn't before. I've avoided close contact for years—let alone my minimal relationship with Sakura before the incident. But once she came into my home, I was able to see the woman she had become and fell for her. This woman is smart, deep, caring and beautiful, and I am both proud of who she has become and grateful that I have the opportunity to share my life with her.

"I'm old. That is a fact no one can hide, but even with all my years of life experience, I cannot say I've had as much experience in love as people would think. My sexual history precedes me, but I'm not as depraved as people would think or hope for. I'm not with Sakura because I want to mess around with her. She is the first woman I've ever loved, and it's because of that love that I'm here with her."

During his speech, Kakashi felt the intent gaze of Sakura's father upon himself, but he held firm and kept talking. "I know you may have doubts about my motives in dating your daughter, but I do care for her—to the extent that I risked my own happiness by having Sakura wait and sort out her feelings. I could've let her rush into a relationship with me, but her future and happiness outweigh my own, and I would have never forgiven myself if I endangered either. So I distanced myself, but Sakura decided she would have me. It's something that I'm grateful for and I will spend the rest of my life paying my thanks to her. I swore to protect her once, and I still abide by that oath. I will never let anything happen to Sakura if I can prevent it; if Kami allows it, I wish for her to be by my side until the end of time and I will spend each day cherishing her like the treasure she is and more."

This time, Mr. Haruno was the one who spoke. "Are you really sure about this, Sakura? A relationship isn't something you can change your mind about. This isn't like 'what shoes do I want to wear out today.'"

She nodded. "As I've already told him, I'm not afraid of this. A wrinkle won't change my mind, and like I told him before, as long as we grow old together, we'll change together."

Her argument finished, Sakura's father slowly stood up. Taking her hand, he pulled the puzzled girl onto her feet. Amidst the confused looks in the room, he suddenly embraced his daughter.

"We love you, Sakura. And if this is the man you're in love with, we'll love him as well. So don't worry about us and be happy."

Sakura's mother, getting to her feet, also stood up to embrace her husband and her daughter. It was a family moment as they hugged, holding each other through the joy and relief that Sakura had found a man to spend time with and to make her happy, as well as her parents' final moments of holding their little girl as "their little girl." Knowing this, Kakashi knew better than to intrude and instead lowered his eyes respectfully and smiled to himself. Hopefully, one day, he'd be able to call these people family as well.

After that, they had some tea and spent some time letting Sakura's parents get to know Kakashi better, while Kakashi forgot all his nervousness before coming and enjoyed those moments with the Haruno family.

* * *

A couple of hours later, Sakura and Kakashi were heading towards the Hokage tower.

"Are you sure you want to go now? There's a nice tree I know of where we could watch the sunset in."

"Kakashi, the sun isn't going to set for _at least_ six more hours."

"Doesn't hurt saving our seats now. It's a really nice view."

At Kakashi's thinly-veiled attempts to escape, Sakura chuckled half-amused, half-pitying. It was so strange seeing Kakashi so put out as opposed to being his usual stoic self. Then again, having to express his feelings to other people had to be really hard on him, and she appreciated his efforts. She really did and showed it with a gentle squeeze of her hand over his.

"Kakashi, you don't have to worry about Tsunade. She probably already half-expected this. Just think of it this way: after we tell her we're dating, we won't have to worry!"

"You're forgetting our friends…" he reminded.

"Well, they'll be easier to deal with," she replied patting his arm reassuringly.

"What about Naruto?" he reminded quietly.

The mention of the corn-haired boy made Sakura stop dead in her tracks, her heart gripped tightly in ice. Both of them knew how much Naruto had liked her—how long he'd liked her for.

"He never asked about us while the rumors were going around. He's been quiet," Kakashi told her quietly. The hand on his arm faltered slightly. To be honest, she'd completely forgotten about Naruto. Not on purpose of course, but on accident. Lately, she hadn't seen much of Naruto because he was always on Anbu missions with his team. She wasn't even sure if he'd heard the rumors.

Sakura's lips pressed into a thin line. "I want to say I want him to be happy for us, but that'd be selfish of me. I don't want to hurt him or for him to stop talking to us. I just hope he takes the news well."

Sakura let her sentence trail off, instead letting her head rest in the space offered to her at his side. Kakashi didn't say anything and rubbed her arm comfortingly.

_

* * *

_

Knock knock.

"Come in."

Tsunade's voice came from behind a stack of paperwork that hid her face from view. It was so tall, in fact, that only the crown of her head was visible, giving the stack the appearance of having pigtails.

Lifting her free hand, she motioned them in from the doorway and prompted them to speak.

"We've come to ask your permission to date, Tsunade-sama." Kakashi was the one who spoke first, a hand over the back of his neck as he stood slouched. Usually, he would've damned the consequences—they were both consenting adults. Permission wasn't necessary—but he knew how much Sakura loved Tsunade and how much Tsunade loved Sakura. Their relationship wasn't just teacher-student; Tsunade often told him that Sakura was like a daughter to her, and he felt obligated to at least let Tsunade know that he would be dating her apprentice. More than that, though he hated facing these channels of social convention, he hated the idea of having to sneak around behind Tsunade's back to date, and Sakura deserved more than that. She was worth much more than the pain of having to do these awkward conventions anyway.

"So I was right about you two?" Tsunade asked with a smirk, leaning to the right of the stack of paperwork on a delicately poised hand. Truth to be told, Tsunade had contemplated letting them sit on the edge of their seats with her reaction by feigning anger. However, Shizune had dropped off a stack of building contracts and treaty drafts that needed her review and signature by the end of the day so she didn't have time to mess with them. Oh well, another day.

"Just being friends wasn't enough for either of us," Sakura replied with a slight blush as she fidgeted and stared at the floor.

"Which means I won the bet!" Tsunade shouted triumphantly, already breaking out a bottle of sake for a victory drink before handing both Kakashi and Sakura a dish of sake.

The pink-haired medic, accepting the drink, turned beet-red. Tsunade was _definitely_ taking the news in a good way. She could _practically_ see how much Tsunade would be gloating when she got the money from the bet. She'd never let Jiraiya live it down. She'd never let _her _live it down either. Sakura cringed at the thought of working under Tsunade for the next few weeks; no doubt Tsunade would be teasing her to death whenever they went on dates.

'How embarrassing…' Sakura thought despairingly.

Noticing Sakura's grimace, Kakashi decided to intervene and cleared his throat loudly, catching Tsunade's attention. "Tsunade-hime, if you're done gloating…"

At the nickname, Tsunade bristled and glared at the masked nin. However, he was right. It was a bit much to be acting this way, especially when she still had work to do. Still, he was such a spoilsport. Maybe Sakura would help loosen that stick up his ass. "Fine," she said pouting.

"Thank you. Now, may we please be excused? We have more people to tell the news to. And I hope I don't have to ask you to not announce this to the entire village. We don't want the entire village to know our sex life."

She, relaxing into her chair, laughed and waved off the notion. "Oh, don't worry. Knowing you're together will be enough for the bet. Actually, it's even better than you two just having sex." She enjoyed another view of the utterly-flushed Sakura before smiling warmly at the two.

"Well now that you're together, I expect some changes in you two. I'm letting you date my pupil, Kakashi, so you better damn well be happy and grateful every day, if not every second. And Sakura, it's time for you to find a life outside of work. Start by enjoying it with him," Tsunade said motioning her head at Kakashi.

Sakura and Kakashi both smiled. They would have no problem keeping to those conditions. "Thank you, Hokage-sama."

Tsunade smiled in satisfaction. "Ah, alright. Enough of this sappiness. You both have my blessing, now go kiss or make babies or something," she said and dismissed them with a wave of her hand.

* * *

Since they still had to tell the news to their friends, they asked Tsunade to keep it secret until then, but the truth was they didn't know how to tell their friends. They wanted to just gather their friends all together to make the explanation easier (as opposed to stopping door to door), but they didn't know how. Organizing a meeting would be too obvious. Their friends weren't stupid (at least, not all of them). They would surely ask a lot of questions for why there was a meeting and they'd have to explain of course—Ino and Genma would make sure of that—effectively ruining the surprise.

Fortunately, they found a good opportunity in the Tanabata (1) festival which was to be held in Konoha in a few days. All their friends would attend, so it would be the perfect place to reveal the news.

Four days later, the first lights of the night were lit in the streets and people began to gather next to the Hokage tower. Stalls with every kind of food were already up and running, and by nine o'clock, almost all the shinobi and the villagers were attending the festival. Along the edges of the streets stood bamboo branches with decorated papers attached where the kids had written their wishes while all the civilian women (and some men too) wore yukata (2). The general atmosphere was very excited. Unfortunately, shinobi were required to wear their uniforms during these occasions to be ready for any eventuality since the village was more vulnerable than usual during these festivals due to the crowded streets.

That afternoon, Kakashi told Genma he would meet him in the ramen stall, while Sakura told Ino and Naruto the same. This way, they were sure to find all their friends there, and indeed, everyone was present, already chatting away.

Suddenly, Anko saw all the people in the street moving to the side, making space for some people who were walking towards them. As soon as she realized who they were and noticed they were walking hand in hand, she choked on the dango (3) she was eating.

"Guys…!" she shouted in an uneasy, strangled tone, pointing and drawing the others' attention to the approaching couple.

The jaws all dropped at once. It wasn't like discovering Sakura and Kakashi being in love was a big surprise, but seeing them show it off in public was… well, unexpected. This was _Kakashi,_ after all.

The newly couple reached their friends with a big smile. Seeing them so flustered was rather amusing. This triumphant entry left nothing else to explain, and their friends did not ask any questions. Throughout the night, Ino winked a couple of times at Sakura, assuring her pink-haired friend of her approval.

They spent a pleasurable night. Sometimes, they felt eyes glued to the two of them but they didn't pay any attention to it – after all it was to be expected - and eventually, they bid their goodbyes before going away. Only then did Naruto approach them, making sure to be out of hearing distance. He had spent the night being oddly quiet, eyeing them every now and again, leaving them puzzled.

Sakura was a bit anxious about what he was going to say. After all, he was one of her closest friends, along with Ino, so she hoped he would accept her relationship with Kakashi.

"So…you've finally found yourself a boyfriend, eh Sakura-chan?" Both his tone and expression were giving nothing away about his thoughts.

"Yeah. I know it must be a little awkward for you to see us like this, but…"

"It's not like that." He cut her off before reconsidering a little. "Well okay, maybe just a bit, but I'm not questioning this."

He looked at her intensely, then turned to Kakashi. After a while, he sighed and moved his eyes to the ground, kicking a little pebble out of his way.

"In fact, I'm not questioning anything at all. I can't say I'm not a little bit disappointed by this, but it's not because of Kakashi-sensei. It's just…I've liked you for all these years, but I know you love me only as a brother and nothing more. Even while I liked you, I always knew we would never be together and that eventually you would find a boyfriend that wasn't me."

"Naruto…" Sakura ventured, taking a step toward him, but he resumed his speech.

"I also thought that your boyfriend—no matter who he was—would never be as worthy of you as I was, but now, I have to admit you've chosen the only man I trust with all of my being. And since you are the two people I care for the most, I'm happy for you two." He lifted his eyes towards them and smiled.

"About time you found yourself a girlfriend, sensei!"

Kakashi simply chuckled.

"I couldn't have stood it if you fell for someone like Kiba or Sai, Sakura-chan! But Kakashi-sensei is all right with me. If I ever had to concede defeat to someone for your heart, I'm glad it was Kakashi-sensei." And with this, he gave his usual and sincerest wide smile.

Seeing that, Sakura suddenly jumped on him, hugging him in a smothering embrace.

"Oh, Naruto, you don't know how happy I am hearing those words from you. I wanted our relationship to be accepted by you so much. Even if we haven't seen each other as often as we did before, you're still my best friend."

Unbeknownst to Sakura, Naruto's face was becoming blue for the loss of oxygen; Kakashi quickly intervened.

"Sakura, you're killing him," he said with slight alarm as he helped put space between them. Sakura quickly let go.

"Oops! I'm sorry, Naruto!" She gave a sheepishly smile.

"Don't worry, I'm used to it!" he laughed and gave a wink at her.

* * *

The following day, Kakashi asked Sakura to meet him.

"Yo!" He gave her his trademark crinkled-eye smile.

"Hello, Kakashi," she returned. On that day, Sakura was wearing her favorite dress since he'd asked her to wear something pretty, though she didn't know why. He didn't tell her and refused to answer, even with all her prodding questions. "So, where are we going?"

"I want you to meet someone. Follow me." He slid his arm around her waist and led her through the street. As the houses and stores melted away, she understood where they were headed, but remained quiet through the trip.

"Since I met your parents, I thought it would be fitting if I introduced you to my family," he said this as they came to a halt in front of the Memorial Stone. He kneeled down and began to trace his friend's name with his finger, quietly voicing them.

"Obito, Rin, Sensei, and even you, father, I want to introduce you to Sakura. She's my girlfriend."

He then stood up and embraced her from behind, as if to emphasize his own words.

"Would you have ever thought that I would be with someone after what happened? It must seem so sudden, but I can tell you she's worth the risk to suffer again. She's opened my eyes and taught me how to love again. You'd love her, too."

Sakura's eyes filled with tears. Staying there like that and being introduced to the people he loved the most made her feel honoured.

"I'm sorry to tell you I will come here less often from now on. Tsunade's given direct orders to find my happiness and spend more time with Sakura, but I know I'll never forget you." He paused a moment, then added, "Obito, you'll finally be able to see a happy life through your eye. You should thank her for this." Then he tightened his hug and gave her a peck on the cheek.

"Let's go now, Sakura."

She nodded and they headed back to the village.

* * *

One year later, Kakashi and Sakura could still be seen together as a happy couple. The rumors eventually faded as expected, and they were finally happy. Sometimes they would spend the night together, and this morning found them cuddled in Kakashi's bed. He was waiting for her to wake up, drinking in her sleepy beauty, and greeted her as soon as she opened her eyes.

"Good morning, sleepy-head."

"Mm… morning Kakashi. Did you sleep well?"

"Well I would've, but there was this odd pink-haired lump in my bed that kept tossing and turning all night." At her miffed pout, Kakashi chuckled lightly and nuzzled against her face with his nose. "Kidding," he reassured, "I always sleep well when you're here."

Smiling, he leaned in until their foreheads were touching. Sakura saw he was about to speak and wondered what he was going to say. He took this position to speak only when he had something important to say: when he told her about his past; when they talked about their feelings before she left his house; when he told her he loved her for the first time. What was it this time, she wondered.

She was snapped from her reverie by his deep voice.

"Sakura, would you marry me?"

Her eyes instantly widened. "Are you…really…?" Sakura was unable to form a proper sentence from the shock. Kakashi chuckled.

"Yes, I am. Sakura, I love you and you love me. We've been dating for a year and it has been the happiest period of my whole life."

Sakura couldn't help but smile at this. It was the same for her, too.

"The only way I can think for me to be even happier than this would be by living together long-term, so that's why I'm asking, 'will you marry me?'"

She didn't need to think it out. She immediately cried, "Yes!" before her voice would fail her.

She was laughing and crying at the same time, overwhelmed by too many emotions to name or deal with, but she was sure of one thing: Kakashi was right. The only way to be happier than they already were was to live together forever, and that's why she gladly agreed to become Mrs. Hatake Sakura.

THE END.

* * *

(1) Tanabata festival: is held in Japan on July 7th to commemorate the love between Vega and Altair, which can see each other only once in a year. People, mostly the kids, usually write their wishes on papers and hang them up on bamboo trees.

(2) Yukata: the informal cotton kimono, used only during summer.

(3) Dango: 3 balls of mochi stuck on a small stick. Sometimes served with a sauce over them. Every time you see Anko, she's eating them.

**

* * *

**

A/N

: Oh my, I'm so sad this story has finished! I hope you enjoyed it, since it has been my hardest work.

I know someone could say this last chapter was unnecessary, but I've read tons of stories in which they get together and… nothing. My own previous stories were also like that. You don't know how the other people will take the news, especially Sakura's parents or even Naruto. I just wanted for once to deal with this, too.

I didn't want someone to oppose them, but I didn't want to make them automatically accepted either without knowing the how and the why. That's all.

Thank you to all the readers, especially to all those who left reviews…I love you all! Don't forget to leave a final review; I'd like to know if you liked the whole story!

And a big—no—huge thank you to moodiful819 which has transformed my poor writing into this beautiful story. I owe you a lot and I'm honoured to have worked with you!

Bows to you all and see you in the next story!

Kakashisukidayo


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